"Oh, wow." "Haha, you're so funny." "Why would you want to do that?"
These are the responses I received from my friends and family when I told them what my topic of the week would be. So why exactly is talking about sex so...taboo? Many people aren't open to the idea of talking about their sex lives; I got the same kinds of responses when I decided to tell the people most supportive of me that I would be becoming a Sex Therapist.
If no one feels comfortable talking about their sex lives, at least with their partner, then they should be remaining abstinent. Now, I know that 9th grade health class covered a little bit about Herpes, Chlamydia, and video of a woman giving birth in 1972, but I'm here to bust numerous myths about having fun in the sheets.
1. You can't get pregnant the first time you have sex.
False. You might think the odds will be in your favor, but really if it's your first time, you will be less experienced and less likely to use protection/use that protection properly.
2. You can't get pregnant during your period.
Wrong. Maybe if it's perfectly timed but...? During a woman's menstrual cycle, her unfertilized egg is being released at some point that week (it's different for all women).
3. You can't get STIs from oral sex.
Nope! Oral sex still involves genitals, and if they're infected, you definitely could be too! Have you seen those pictures of people who have Herpes on their lips? (Yikes!)
4. You would know if you or your significant other had an STI.
Although this is true in some cases, not all Sexually Transmitted Infections are visible. Truly the only way of knowing if you or your partner has something going on, would be getting to the dreaded Gynecologist/OGBYN appointment to get tested. Not to worry, most STIs take antibiotics to get rid of or at least to make their side effects dormant.
5. You don't need to use outside sources of protection if you're going to practice the "pull-out" method.
Wrong. So wrong. This "method" of birth control is only about 60% effective, and is that really worth the risk? This percentage is so low for two reasons: first, even if pulling out was the plan, when the time comes, who knows what else will? Second, it's been shown that sperm can still be found in pre-ejaculation. (Basically don't just rely on the "pull-out" method).
6. You can use two condoms to be twice as protected, right?
Definitely not. We can all see why you might think this to be true, but in reality, the two (or more) condoms would rub against each other too much and this would cause them to break. One is plenty in this situation.
7. Your hymen has been broken so you must not be a virgin.
Believe it or not, the government actually used to use this to determine if women were lying about being raped or not. Studies now show that some women are just simply born without hymens, or are born with them broken. Sex is not the only thing that would harm a perfectly fine hymen; something as simple as riding a bike or inserting a tampon would do the trick.
8. If you're using one form of birth control, that'll be good enough.
I applaud you for using one, however, why not take the pill AND use a condom? You can never have too much protection. The pill will also only prevent pregnancies, not STIs.
9. It's deathly painful for every woman's first time.
Another myth. This all depends on vaginal tightness and if everyone involved is aroused and ready.
10. All I'm really trying to say is... wrap it
and be comfortable talking about any insecurities with your partner!
