Nickelback Is EASILY The Most Overrated Rock Band Ever

Nickelback Is EASILY The Most Overrated Rock Band Ever

The sound, the lyrics, the vocals are all so recycled, and they should not be remembered fondly.


Many bands have released seminal albums; pieces of art. The Beatles released "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" and captivated rock fans abroad. The Pixies released both "Doolittle" and "Surfer Rosa," two albums that would come to define alternative rock as a genre. Oasis dropped "(What's The Story) Morning Glory," easily one of the best albums of the past 25 years.

A lot of these bands have an impressive discography as well, but there is one band that would be classified as alternative rock that regularly makes my stomach churn: Nickelback, the epitome of manufactured music.

First, the sound. Yes, distortion sounds cool. The drums sound nice and refined. It seems to fit the definition of post-grunge (ick) slash hard rock. You know who else does? Creed and Theory of A Deadman. Seriously, listen to any of these groups. Sonically, all three bands have the same sound; slightly distorted, slightly muddied sound, with gruff vocals and drum sounds that are very poppy in sound. Every single band seems like they are ripping off one another, whether it be the vocals or the instrumentals. It is a shame and we need to stop supporting it. This isn't like rap; there are no samples. It is regurgitated often.

Let's just talk about the lyrics. Boring, superficial, filled with nothing other than the skin deep words of a band that seems more like an industrial plant. Prime example; "Rockstar." Why glorify a lifestyle that prioritizes the most superficial things in life? Oh my, you got into a club. You know some socialites. Wow. "Photograph," the most remarkably "fake-deep" song in existence. Look, nostalgia is a wonderful feeling, but the most that song has produced for our society is a perfect video with a perfect moment for memes. There are songs with far more sentimental value. That isn't even touching on the filler that comprises the majority of their work.

LASTLY, the vocals. AWFUL. We can just talk about the sound of Chad's voice. It's grating. It's consistently repetitive, never really changing much from song to song; low pitch, high pitch, low pitch. Repeat. Seriously, take a deep listen to "Photograph" or other songs, like "How You Remind Me." You cannot tell me that the voice is different from song to song. Don't get me wrong, I know artists cannot vary their voices that significantly. HOWEVER, when two songs sound essentially the same, and this is repeated from album to album? No. His voice is one of the most grating voices in rock.

Post-grunge is a genre that has been bastardized by so many artists, and Nickelback making radio-friendly rock with little deviation epitomizes this. Bland lyrics, bland sounds, bland vocals. The band dominated rock with a radio-friendly formula. Hat's off to them for finding what worked, but they are not an entertaining band. That's why a brewery in Ann Arbor refused to be associated with them. If I want post-grunge, I'll go listen to the Foo Fighters. Not the Canadian 3 Doors Down. Thank you and good night.

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A Playlist From The iPod Of A Middle Schooler In 2007

I will always love you, Akon.

Something happened today that I never thought in a million years would happen. I opened up a drawer at my parents' house and I found my pink, 4th generation iPod Nano. I had not seen this thing since I graduated from the 8th grade, and the headphones have not left my ears since I pulled it out of that drawer. It's funny to me how music can take you back. You listen to a song and suddenly you're wearing a pair of gauchos, sitting on the bleachers in a gym somewhere, avoiding boys at all cost at your seventh grade dance. So if you were around in 2007 and feel like reminiscing, here is a playlist straight from the iPod of a middle schooler in 2007.

1. "Bad Day" — Daniel Powter

2. "Hips Don't Lie" — Shakira ft. Wyclef Jean

SEE ALSO: 23 Iconic Disney Channel Moments We Will Never Forget

3. "Unwritten" — Natasha Bedingfield

4. "Run It!" — Chris Brown

5. "Girlfriend" — Avril Lavigne

6. "Move Along" — All-American Rejects

7. "Fergalicious" — Fergie

8. "Every Time We Touch" — Cascada

9. "Ms. New Booty" — Bubba Sparxxx

10. "Chain Hang Low" — Jibbs

11. "Smack That" — Akon ft. Eminem

12. "Waiting on the World to Change" — John Mayer

13. "Stupid Girls" — Pink

14. "Irreplaceable" — Beyonce

15. "Umbrella" — Rihanna ft. Jay-Z

16. "Don't Matter" — Akon

17. "Party Like A Rockstar" — Shop Boyz

18. "This Is Why I'm Hot" — Mims

19. "Beautiful Girls" — Sean Kingston

20. "Bartender" — T-Pain

21. "Pop, Lock and Drop It" — Huey

22. "Wait For You" — Elliot Yamin

23. "Lips Of An Angel" — Hinder

24. "Face Down" — Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

25. "Chasing Cars" — Snow Patrol

26. "No One" — Alicia Keys

27. "Cyclone" — Baby Bash ft. T-Pain

28. "Crank That" — Soulja Boy

29. "Kiss Kiss" — Chris Brown

SEE ALSO: 20 Of The Best 2000's Tunes We Still Know Every Word To

30. "Lip Gloss" — Lil' Mama

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My AP Environmental Science Class' Cookie Mining Experiment Shows Why Capitalism Is Destroying The Planet

Who cares about the environment with profits this high?


With the AP exams in May approaching quickly, my AP Environmental Science class has wasted no time in jumping right into labs. To demonstrate the damage to the environment done by strip mining, we were instructed to remove the chocolate chips from cookies.

The experiment in itself was rather simple. We profited from fully or partially extracted chips ($8 for a full piece and $4 for a partial) and lost from buying tools, using time and area and incurring fines.

This might seem simplistic, but it showcased the nature of disastrous fossil fuel companies.

We were fined a $1 per minute we spent mining. It cost $4 per tool we bought (either tweezers or paper clips) and 50 cents for every square centimeter of cookie we mined.

Despite the seemingly overbearing charges compared to the sole way to profit, it was actually really easy to profit.

If we found even a partial chocolate chip per minute, that's $3 profit or utilization elsewhere. Tools were an investment that could be made up each with a partial chip, and clearly we were able to find much, much more than just one partial chip per tool.

Perhaps the most disproportionally easiest thing to get around were the fines. We were liable to be fined for habitat destruction, dangerous mining conditions with faulty tools, clutter, mess and noise level. No one in the class got fined for noise level nor faulty tools, but we got hit with habitat destruction and clutter, both of which added up to a mere $6.

We managed to avoid higher fines by deceiving our teacher by pushing together the broken cookie landscapes and swiping away the majority of our mess before being examined for fining purposes. This was amidst all of our cookies being broken into at least three portions.

After finding many, many chips, despite the costs of mining, we profited over $100. We earned a Franklin for destroying our sugary environment.

We weren't even the worst group.

It was kind of funny the situations other groups simulated to their cookies. We were meant to represent strip mining, but one group decided to represent mountaintop removal. Mountaintop removal is where companies go to extract resources from the tops of mountains via explosions to literally blow the tops off. This group did this by literally pulverizing their cookies to bits and pieces with their fists.

They incurred the maximum fine of $45. They didn't profit $100, however.

They profited over $500 dollars.

In the context of our environmental science class, these situations were anywhere from funny to satisfying. In the context of the real world, however, the consequences are devastating our environment.

Without even mentioning the current trajectory we're on approaching a near irreversible global temperature increase even if we took drastic measures this moment, mining and fracking is literally destroying ecosystems.

We think of earthquakes as creating mass amounts of sudden movement and unholy deep trenches as they fracture our crust. With dangerous mining habits, we do this ourselves.

Bigger companies not even related to mining end up destroying the planet and even hundreds of thousands of lives. ExxonMobil, BP? Still thriving in business after serial oil spills over the course of their operation. Purdue Pharma, the company who has misled the medical community for decades about the effects of OxyContin and its potential for abuse, is still running and ruining multitudes more lives every single day.

Did these companies receive fines? Yes.

But their business model is too profitable to make the fines have just about any effect upon their operation.

In our cookie mining simulation, we found that completely obliterating the landscape was much more profitable than being careful and walking on eggshells around the laws. Large, too-big-to-fail companies have held the future of our planet in their greedy paws and have likewise pulverized our environment, soon enough to be unable to return from.

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