To anyone who is still struggling to find a way to control their anxiety or depression:

This year has been a complete nightmare for me. I have struggled with anxiety and depression my entire life. I was put on countless medications, but all of them came with unbearable side effects; I even ended up in the ER due to a bad interaction with the medications. I had tried natural supplements, cognitive behavioral therapy, but nothing seemed to work. I was able to get through high school with the support of my family and friends.

The transition from high school to my first year in college exacerbated my symptoms so much so that I was unable to function. I was unable to go to classes and some days were so bad that I could not get out of bed, let alone do simple tasks such as going to the dining hall or even shower. I lost interest in everything that used to bring me joy. I felt like a hollow shell of my old self. I couldn’t see myself being able to finish the semester let alone living the rest of my life struggling like this. After I had just barely passed my first semester at CU I couldn’t wait to finally go home for winter break.

Over break, my mom brought up the idea of Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation, or TMS. For those of you who are not familiar with TMS, it is a type of therapy that uses targeted magnetic pulses to stimulate key areas of the brain that are underactive in patients with depression.

When I first looked up TMS it completely freaked me out, it reminded me of electroshock therapy. For all of you Stranger things fans, I imagined I would end up like Eleven’s mother. I told my mom no way.

I continued on this downward spiral until I eventually hit rock bottom. I was completely and utterly hopeless. I realized something needed to change. After talking with my family and further research into TMS I decided I had to give it a shot. I began treatment a couple days after.

I received treatment every day for the three weeks I was home. At first, the treatment was a bit uncomfortable but after a few sessions I got used to it. It was definitely a hassle having to go there every day, but over the course of the three weeks, I began to improve. I was smiling and laughing again. I found that I was able to the little tasks that only a month ago seemed impossible. I began enjoying spending time with my friends and family like I had once used to and they all agreed that I had improved immensely. I was finally starting to feel like my old self again for the first time in a long time.

People struggling with depression or anxiety have many different treatment options, from naturopathic remedies to medications to talk therapy. I can tell you first hand I have been through it all. I had struggled for so long to find anything that worked but I felt like I would never find anything that would work for me. Until I tried TMS. Not only was the treatment incredibly effective, but it came with no side effects. It completely changed my life.

So, to anyone who has been in my position, know that there is hope.