Dear “Friend”,
We were inseparable, and I loved every minute of it. We did everything together from school classes to anything outside of school, and honestly I thought we’d be friends forever. We had so much in common that we even liked the same boys. You changed me as a person and not for the better.
Everything I ever did when we were friends was to impress you. I wanted to be accepted by you and to be like you. I never liked the things I said I liked; I forgot about who I was for the longest time just to be your friend. And guess what? It hurt me in the end, not you. Not once did you notice the changes I was making were for you. I had become someone I didn’t know when you left; I was someone that couldn’t even look into the mirror because I was disgusted with what looked back.
I spent years- not months, but years- to get myself back. To this day, I’m not fully myself. All the things I had changed about myself became my norm. The way I dress, talk and even the music I like have changed all because I wanted to be your friend.
The whole time, we liked the same TV shows, we liked the same movies and books and we even liked the same boys. All throughout school, we had crushes on the same boys, and you always caught their attention. All of them liked you, but they never even saw me. Maybe they saw me as your shadow, but either way I was never seen.
After all those years of trying to fix myself, to this day, I’m not the same. I still think about the time we were friends, and all those good memories together. I honestly couldn’t say I didn’t have fun with you all those years. I had such a good time that it was actually one of the best parts of my life.
We didn’t just go through bad times, we went through some really great times. I have so many good memories, but with those memories comes hurt and anger. Hurt, because I let you do all those things to me. Anger, because I now realize how dumb I was to befriend you.
But I really would like to say thanks for treating me so badly and for not being my person. You showed me how not to live and to be a true friend to everyone I come across. I have real friends now-- ones who honestly care for me and worry about me. They take into account my opinions and my values. I’ve even found my person-- my ride or die, the one person how knows me more than myself. I would do anything for her, and that’s something you’d never do for me.
You live and you learn. we learn from our mistakes and live on.
Sincerely,
Justice
