My Thanksgiving story

My Thanksgiving story

The things I am thankful for.
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For the past couple days I've been thinking about what thanksgiving really means to me. Now that I'm thinking about it, I realize it has a much deeper meaning than I ever thought it would have to me.

First of all, I was born and raised in Mexico City, and although it is surprising to some people, we do not celebrate Thanksgiving, generally. I mean, we know it's important in the United States but it really isn't our holiday. However, about three years ago, life choices took my mom, my sister and I to Colorado. Originally, that move was meant to last only one year, but I guess that fate had a different plan for us.

My first Thanksgiving was pretty exciting. It still had no real meaning to me, but it was a wonderful excuse to have a great meal with the most important people in my life. To be honest, it was a lot of fun too! We looked up American thanksgiving recipes and for the first time in my life I had the chance to have a hint of what American's experience every Thanksgiving.

The years to come in the United States were definitely unexpected and unpredictable but I learned a lot about myself and the world as well as my place in it. Thus, every holiday season was a time for me to realize how much I had learned and evolved, noticing that every year I was a different person than the previous year.

Throughout those three years in Colorado, I met a lot of people who came from very different backgrounds compared to mine. Which was shocking at first, but one of the most important things I learned from that is how incredibly lucky I am and that I should never take anything for granted. I acknowledged the extraordinary love I received every day from my family and the wonderful friends I've made throughout the years. Thanks to them I've had a beautiful life and grown to become who I am today.

This year, Thanksgiving represented a very special occasion to me since I am extra-grateful to everyone in my life for so many things, plus the fact that I got to experience the holiday away from my family. Even though, that brought up an opportunity to meet new people, as well as helped me to put the things I'm grateful for into perspective.

First of all, I'm grateful for my family, especially my parents. Thanks to them I am living a dream by studying my dream career in one of the best cities in the world, New York City. Secondly, I am thankful for the rest of my family and friends whose love and support live in my heart and motivate me to be the best person I can be every day. Also, I'm thankful for all the amazing people I've met at AMDA who have become my New York family. And last but not least, I am thankful for the opportunities life has given me, showing me in their own way how beautiful life can be if you take the time to see the simple and pretty things found all around you.

In summary, what I've learned from Thanksgiving is that regardless of what it means to you and where you come from, it's important to take some time - at least once in a while - to recognize the things you are thankful for and appreciate them.

Cover Image Credit: Alejandra Ruiz

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To The Boy Who Will Love Me Next

If you can't understand these few things, leave before things get too involved
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To the boy that will love me next, I need you to know and understand things about me and my past. The things I have been though not only have shaped the person I’ve become, but also sometimes controls my life. In the past I’ve been used, abused, and taken for granted, and I want something real this time. The guys before you were just boys; they didn’t know how to treat me until it was too late. They didn’t understand how to love me, until I broke my own heart. Before you truly decide to love me I want you to understand these things.

When I tell you something, please listen.

I’m my own person, I want to be loved a certain way. If I ask you to come over and watch movies with me please do it, if I ask for you to leave me alone for a few hours because it’s a girl’s night please do it. I don’t just say things to hear my own voice, I say things to you because it’s important to my life and the way I want to be loved. I’m not a needy person when it comes to being loved and cared for, but I do ask for you to do the small things that I am say.

Forgive my past.

My past is not a pretty brick road, it is a highway that has a bunch of potholes and cracks in it. I have a lot of baggage, and most of it you won’t understand. But don’t let my past decided whether you want to love me or not. My past has helped form who I am today, but it does not define who I am. My past experiences might try and make an appearance every once in a while, but I will not go back to that person I once was, I will not return to all that hurt I once went though. When I say those things, I’m telling the complete and honest truth. I relive my past every day, somethings haunt me and somethings are good reminds. But for you to love me, I need you to accept my past, present and future.

I’m just another bro to the other guys.

I have always hung out with boys, I don’t fit in with the girl groups. I have 10 close girlfriends, but the majority of my friends are guy, but don’t let this scare you. If I wanted to be with one of my guy friends I would already be with him, and if you haven’t noticed I don’t want them because I’m with you. I will not lose my friendships with all my guy friends to be able to stay with you. I will not cut off ties because you don’t like my guy friends. I have lost too many buddies because of my ex-boyfriends and I promised myself I wouldn’t do that again. If you don’t like how many guy friends I have you can leave now. Don’t bother trying to date me if you can accept the fact I’m just another bro.

I might be a badass, but I actually have a big heart.

To a lot of people I come off to be a very crazy and wild girl. I will agree I can be crazy and wild, but I’m more than that. I’m independent, caring, responsible, understanding, forgiving, and so such more type of woman. Many people think that I’m a badass because I don’t take any negatively from anyone. Just like we learned when we were younger, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.” Most people can’t do that in today’s world, so I stick up for myself and my friends. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me, or their option on how I live my life. The only thing I care about is being able to make myself happy. Even though I’m an independent woman, understand that I do have a big heart. Honesty when I truly care for someone I will do just about anything they ask, but don’t take advantage of this. Once you take advantage of this part of me, all respect will be lost for you.

I’m hard to love.

Sometimes I want to be cuddle and get attention, and sometimes I don’t want you to talk to me for a couple hours. Sometimes I want you to take me out for a nice meal, but sometimes I want a home cooked meal. Every day is different for me, sometimes I change my mind every hour. My mood swings are terrible on certain days, and on those days you should probably just ignore me. I’m not easy to love, so you’ll either be willing to find a way to love me, or you’ll walk out like so many others have.

I’m scared.

I’m scared to love someone again. I’ve been hurt, heartbroken, and beat to the ground in my past relationships. I want to believe you are different, I want to hope things will truly work out, but every relationship has always ended up the same way. I’m scared to trust someone, put my whole heart into them, just to be left and heartbroken again. I sick and tired of putting my whole body and soul into someone for them to just leave when it is convenient for them. If you want to love me, understand it won’t be easy for me to love you back.

When “I’m done.”

When I say “I’m done” I honestly don’t mean that I’m done. When I say that it means I need and want you to fight for me, show me why you want to be with me. I need you to prove that I’m worth it and there’s no one else but me. If I was truly done, I would just walk away, and not come back. So if I ever tell you, “I’m done,” tell me all the reasons why I’m truly not done.

For the boy who will love me next, the work is cut out for you, you just have to be willing to do it. I’m not like other girls, I am my own person, and I will need to be treated as such. For the boy that will love me next, don’t bother with me unless you really want to be with me. I don’t have time to waste on you if you aren’t going to try and make something out of us. To the boy who will love me next, the last thing I would like to say is good luck, I have faith in you.

Cover Image Credit: Danielle Balint

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Doing Nothing All Summer Is Okay Too

It's okay to have no plans this summer.

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Summer seems to roll around faster and faster every year and the question that's always asked is"what are you doing this summer?" Some people love to answer this question, maybe they have a trip planned to backpack across Europe or have a 2-week vacation in the Bahamas. My point is, everyone seems to have these big summer plans. Some people spend the whole summer traveling and are never even home, but there are always gonna be some people who, like me, have absolutely no plans this summer.

Do I wish I was traveling across Europe or spending a few weeks in the Bahamas? Sure. But in reality, my summer plans include working 5 or 6 days a week. I'm not ashamed of this and I wouldn't say I'm jealous of those traveling because I'm still determined to make the best of my summer.

There is so much pressure everywhere on Instagram and Snapchat to post all the fun things you're doing and to capture the moment. This creates the pressure that you always have to be doing something fun or spontaneous.

Summer should be whatever you want it to be. If you want to spend every day at the beach, do it. If you want to spend every day in bed or at home, that's good too. We all have different definitions of fun.

Summer has just started and everyone should make the most of their summer in their own way. My friends and I always make a bucket list of all the things we want to do by the end of the summer. None of it involves traveling or much planning, it's just little things we can do when we get bored.

Don't feel jealous when you see other people traveling this summer. Make your own fun plans, make a bucket list, and make the most of every day this summer.

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