A couple of months ago, I cracked my iPhone screen. My dad suggested that I give him my phone before school so he could get it repaired and return it to me that evening. I was extremely reluctant, to say the least. Go without my phone for an entire day? What if someone texted me or my Snapchat streak ended? What if Beyoncé dropped another surprise album? I could not possibly go a day without my phone, I would miss out on everything. That was when I realized I had a serious problem.

Without my phone, I felt empty. I constantly had a demanding urge to check it to see if I got any messages, notifications, anything, regardless of where I was or who I was with. Whether I was at a friend’s party or having a thoughtful conversation with my brother in the car, a part of my attention was always directed to my phone. I purposely placed my iPhone charger right next to my bed, so that I could be on my phone up until I fell asleep and check it the very moment I woke up. If my phone was missing or if I left it at home while going out, anxiety would immediately kick in. My hand yearned to pick up my prized possession, quickly enter the passcode and divulge in all the features that it had to offer. My addiction worsened so much that even my family noticed. I began to hear complaints that I don’t look at people when I talk to them anymore, or that I tend to constantly text while having a conversation. Only when I saw these problems myself, was I able to reflect on how harmful this really was for me.

I wasn’t addicted to the phone itself, but rather what it contained. My iPhone was my portal to everything I needed. I could contact my friends in an instant, watch videos, listen to music, read the news, research information for a project -- I had access to anything and everything. I loved that feeling of connection and the instant gratification that it provided. My addiction led to a constant need of stimulation, any lack thereof would immediately make me feel “bored.” It was almost as if I was afraid to be left alone with my thoughts, terrified to lose connection for even a second.

No matter how satisfying having a long text chat with a friend is, it never comes close to physically meeting up with that friend at a coffee shop, or going on a long walk with your dog. It wasn’t easy, but I slowly got over this addiction that presumably consumed my life. I started intentionally leaving my phone at home when I went out, abandoning it while walking my dog, and telling my friends and family to make sure I wasn’t distracted while talking with them. The constant anxiety and fear of missing out slowly but steadily began fading away. There are still moments where I spend too much time texting or try to get out of an awkward situation by staring at a screen, but I’m making progress. Getting over this unhealthy obsession has opened new doors for me. I finally appreciate the time spent with family, and I began focusing more on hobbies and less on social media. A lot of the stress and anxiety that I unknowingly carried on my shoulders disappeared, making me much happier and freer. Smartphones and technology have opened so many incredible doors for us. They give us access to vast amounts of information, connection with people all around the world, and a platform to make our voices heard. But in addition to all this, we must learn to take time off from all the chaos and constant stimulation. Our lives were not meant to be lived glued to a screen, but rather by making every moment count and exploring everything this world has to offer. Sometimes, it’s okay to just take a step back and put that phone down.