I'm Not In A Relationship and I Love It
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My 'Single' Relationship Status Doesn't Mean I'm Damaged– It Means I'm Patient

Being single doesn't make me unworthy, damaged, a hoe or a side-piece– thank you.

My 'Single' Relationship Status Doesn't Mean I'm Damaged– It Means I'm Patient

I'm single. I've been single for *most* of my life – with exception to pathetic middle school relationships and a relationship freshman year of high school I would like to forget about.

I love and embrace being single. I've never had a burning desire to be in a relationship, regardless of how many cute relationships I've been exposed to on social media and read within the plots of my favorite books, shows and movies. I even prefer to stay off of dating apps, and choose to ignore any type of message from guys on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook, trying to "slide in my dms."

Even though I love being single, other people often suggest that this is a problem or character flaw. Countless times I have been out and a guy will approach me asking where my boyfriend was or if I had one. I don't see the point in lying and having to say that my "boyfriend" isn't with me or pretend that I have one– because again, I embrace being single. However, whenever I am asked these questions and respond honestly– saying that I don't have one– I am further questioned:

1. "Why not?"

2. "What is wrong with you that a guy wouldn't want you?"

3. "You just like to hook up then?"

In response to those unnecessary follow-up questions, I typically just roll my eyes and move on with my day or night. It wasn't until recently that these questions began to infuriate me.

I feel as if I shouldn't have to justify why I am single.

I'm single because I want to be. I like being independent and carefree. I like not having to be on my phone all the time talking to someone.

I like that when I'm thinking about my future, I'm only thinking about myself, and not factoring another person into it.

I don't think there is anything "wrong" with me.

Not to sound conceited, but guys do want me. More times than not, the guys that like me I'm either not attracted to or just not into pursuing an actual relationship with them.

I don't see the point in being in a relationship with someone if I'm not going to be 100% in it, just because I don't want to be single. That's not fair to anyone involved.

No, I don't like to just hook-up.

Have I had a few hookups while I've been in college? Yep. But when I say few, I mean few–when I've been drunk, which doesn't really count to me. However, just because I am single doesn't mean I would prefer to hook-up with the first person that shows interest (not that there is anything wrong with that).

I was raised with my mom always telling me: "Be in a relationship because you want to be– not because you feel you need to be", and that has stuck with me.

I have never felt like I needed to be in a relationship, nor have I ever felt I was missing out by not being in one. Have I talked to or dated a few guys that maybe I would have wanted to be in a relationship with? Sure, at the time.

However, looking back, I'm glad things didn't work out. If things hadn't of worked out, I wouldn't have learned what I will want in a future partner. I wouldn't have learned what turns me on and what turns me off.

I wouldn't have gotten to know some incredible people (and some not-so-incredible people).

I think that being single has allowed me to gain a sense of independence that is reflected onto everything that I do. I'm evolving into a confident individual whose self-worth can't be diminished because a guy didn't text or snap me back. Failure and rejection, to me, isn't not having a guy not want me back, it's when I lose out on an opportunity that could further grow me as a person– as an individual.

Most importantly, being single has allowed me to understand, that as a person, I am more than having or not having a significant other. At family gatherings when the awkward question of: "So are you seeing anyone?" comes up, I can say: "No," and move on to talking about things that actually matter – such as my accomplishments, goals, and ambitions.

People who are single are not any less than people who are in a relationship. There is nothing wrong with us, and we are surely not hoes just because of how we choose to act on human attraction and hormones. We are still worthy of love and affection – it is just not in our priorities.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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