My illness is expensive, even with my wonderful insurance. I have co-pays for countless medications. I self-injure by biting the skin off my fingers and the only way I can stop is to get monthly manicures. My anxiety creates so much stress in my body that my shoulder muscles seize up and I really ought to be getting massages for that. Just to name a few expenses.

But on the other side, I can't hold a job with my mental illness. My unpredictable breakdowns prevent me from following preset schedules. My anxiety builds in the workplace until I dread going in each and every day. I've tried other methods of making money: babysitting makes me nervous because of too much responsibility, I am too self conscious to attempt to sell anything I've made, and I take too many psychiatric drugs to donate plasma.

Not to mention it's been 3 months and Social Security hasn't gotten back to me.

I know this sounds complainy but I just need to complain right now because as my fingers bleed, my shoulders ache and the skin on my face cracks from my tears I don't know what else there is to do.