It’s that time of year again, yes it’s Halloween but that’s not what I’m talking about. The festival of lights, also known as Diwali, will be occurring this weekend. This a huge celebration for Hindus, Buddhists, and members of the Jain community.The Indian New Year is also on Monday, the same day as Halloween. I think it’s so odd that one culture will be celebrating with candy and stories of death, while another will be celebrating with fireworks and intentions for a new beginning. That exact thought is actually what led me to write this post. Sometimes, we forget that there is more to this town, this country, and this world than just us and our lives and our customs. I find it so funny that we can be so unaware to how differently people can be celebrating the same day.
Growing up, I have always been aware of the beauty in others’ beliefs and practices, but I think that was more of a reality rather than a luxury. I did not have the luxury to be a member of the majority population (be it race, religion, or ethnicity) where all of the holidays I celebrated were celebrated by everyone else in the town as well. Instead, I grew up constantly hiding my cultural identity, because I was the only Indian in my entire school. During festivals such as Diwali, I had to be extra careful. I dreaded having to answer questions like “what’s that red dot on your forehead?” because I was so sure I had scrubbed it all off before going to school. (By the way, if you don’t know what the “red dot” is please just look it up at this point, also it’s not called a “dot” it’s a “chaalo” or “bindi”). I refused to pack an Indian lunch, much to my mother’s disdain, because a few jerks at lunch had to say “that looks disgusting!” Yes, and your pre-packaged lunchable doesn’t look disgusting. But that’s the point, that lunchable is normal to them because everyone else has one too. Why are we so scared of the unknown? Why do we teach our children to seek comfort in what they know, rather than to step outside of their comfort zones and learn something new? Like I said before, I never had the luxury to just stay in my comfort zone and I’m so glad that I didn’t. Because, this world is filled with new experiences and beautiful cultures, all of which we should embrace and attempt to learn more about rather than just dismissing them for their differences.
I still run into high school classmates who say “yeah, you were always so quiet” well, what did you expect? My culture was mocked in history class, my religion ridiculed for not being like yours, and everything else in between micro-analyzed while I sat in the back hoping no one expected me to chime in to the conversation that mocks everything I stand for.
However, going to college and meeting people from all walks of life has made it easier for me to talk about my cultural differences to listening ears who are truly interested in diversity. I met people who had different educational experiences, their teachers in grade school took the time to explain the beauty of different cultures. Many of these people lived in towns that were soaked in cultural diversity. I envied those people, but I understood that my experience has shaped me to be the person that I am today. I met people who wanted to learn how to wear traditional Indian clothing, others who didn’t ask questions in a judgmental manner, and my all-time favorite roommates who wanted to try traditional Indian cooking and watch Bollywood movies with me. I think the latter really made a bigger difference in my life than they will probably ever understand. And now that I’ve had these positive experiences I walk a little taller and I’m not so quick to run away from judgement.
It’s still not easy though, on the day of Diwali I’ll do as I have done for the last few years. I’ll light candles all throughout my front porch, and hope none of the neighbors find it suspicious. I’ll stop by the Kroger in the neighboring town after attending Sunday service, but on this day, I’ll be wearing my Sunday best (just as all church goers do). However, unlike any church goer who grabs some groceries after service, I’ll be watched by most of the people who pass me in the isles; My Indian attire setting me apart like a sore thumb. The only difference is that this time I don’t care. I don’t care if you think I look weird, I don’t care if I’m too “foreign or immigrant looking”. I especially don’t care if my culture makes you uncomfortable. It’s taken me a long time to get to this point, and I think this current election and the sudden power that some racist Trump supporters feel, has made me realize just how sad it must be to live in fear of the unknown. I feel sorry for you if you are afraid of me, are disgusted by me, or hate me, because of my differences. I wish I could say this to the middle school and high school version of me, but I’m done stepping on my toes to make sure you are comfortable with your surroundings.
