To My Mom Who Is Not Here To See Me, Graduate.

My mom passed away 5 years ago when I was 31 years old, she was able to see me get married, and when I had my two oldest boys. She passed before she was able to see my oldest son go to kindergarten and was not here when my middle son turned one, and she was not here when I gave birth to my youngest son, and she will not be here when I graduate next week from college.

My mom was a single parent, she raised my brother and me, and also helped my grandmother after my grandfather passed away. She worked two jobs to give us the best education. She was my mother and father, my best friend and the person that would give me advice when I need it.

My mom struggled with many different health issues, but she was always full of life and would do things on her own if she could, she would only ask for help if she really needed too. On March 24th, 2015 at 11:30 am, I got a call from the Fayetteville police telling me my mom was gone.

At that moment my world stopped, I broke down in tears, I was home alone with my 11-month-old son, next I had to do one of the hardest things and that was to call my brother who lives on Ohio and tell him our mother was gone. The only thing the doctors could tell us is that it was her heart.

It took me a long time to not blame myself for not calling her back the day I got back from my trip, I know she knew I loved her, I was just so mad at myself because I didn't make that phone call.

In the past 5 years, I have had my 3rd child, celebrated my 10 year wedding anniversary, and next week be a college grad. 3 things my mom will never see.

She was so proud of me when I started college, she knew I always wanted to be a journalist, she supported me through everything in my life, and I thank her every day for that because I wouldn't be where I am today if it wasn't for her.

Now that I'm 36 and finally graduating, I wanted to say to my mom.

I know you are not physically here, But I know you are with me and are proud of the woman I have become and all the hard work I have done over the years has finally paid off.

And you would be so proud of your grandkids and how they are growing into strong, smart, handsome boys.

I love you mom and I wish you were here to see all the milestones we are making.