You Can’t Move Onto Your Next If You’re Still Hung Up On Your Ex

You Can’t Move Onto Your Next If You’re Still Hung Up On Your Ex

This should be a no-brainer, right?

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This should be a no-brainer, right? Who would get into a new relationship after just getting out of one? Obviously, there's still lingering feelings there.

We've all heard the expression: time heals all wounds. And that's true. When I broke up with my first boyfriend, it took time to heal. To learn to be on my own and love myself all by myself.

But nowadays, we're all so obsessed with relationships. With finding "the one" and ignoring the fact that we need our alone time. We need time to learn about ourselves, what we like and don't like—especially in a partner.

I'm here to remind you, ladies and gents, it's OK to be single. Don't rush into a new relationship with some guy you met off Tinder not two minutes after your break up because you're "bored" or "lonely."

Nothing can fill that void. Not even a new guy.

Some argue you never truly get over your first love—and I argue that's completely untrue.

First off, how unfair is it to your next? While you're with them, you're still thinking about him? If you're still thinking about them, you're not over them.

I mean, you can obviously still think about them. Maybe you see their favorite movie and wonder how they're doing.

But if you're with someone new, and for some reason, all you can do is think about your ex—you're not over them.

You're not ready to give your whole heart to someone new because someone else still has a piece of it.

I'm not preaching "moving on." Instead, I encourage you to slow down. The right one will come along eventually. I can't tell you how many people I know who are constantly obsessed with finding someone simply because they just can't be alone.

I'll admit, being alone isn't fun. It's nice to have someone constantly there for you. It's like a best friend who's obligated to hang out with you—except you guys occasionally have sex.

But your alone time and your healing time is crucial for your own development. And, by allowing yourself to fully cope with your breakup, you're also saving your next from getting hurt in the end.

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5 Powerful Rihanna Songs That Prove Relationships Ain't Easy

"I still love you, but I just can't do this."

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Relationships aren't perfect. They can be painful and aggravating. They can be problematic and detrimental to our mental health.

Of course, relationships require a great deal of time and commitment to maintain, but if you're not with the love of your life, is it even worth it?

Here are five beautifully powerful Rihanna songs that prove relationships are harder than they look.

1. "Take A Bow"

"Don't tell me you're sorry cause you're not // Baby when I know you're only sorry you got caught"

2. "Stupid In Love"

"I still love you, but I just can't do this"

3. "Rehab"

"I never gave myself to another the way I gave it to you // You don't even recognize the ways you hurt me, do you? // It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back // And you're the one to blame"

4. "Te Amo"

"I understand that we all need love and I'm not afraid // I feel the love but I don't feel that way"

5. "Stay"

"Funny you're the broken one but I'm the only one who needed saving // 'Cause when you never see the light it's hard to know which one of us is caving"

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To The Girls Who Spend All Their Time With Their Boyfriends, There Is More To Life Than Him

Spend time apart, don't get dependent, and check up on your friends.

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I know, I know. There have been so many articles already written opposing what I am about to say. I understand that saying a girl shouldn't spend time with her boyfriend is absurd and just plain unfathomable. Hear me out, though, because that is not entirely what I'm saying.

There are girls who spend all of their time with their boyfriends. All of it. Morning until night, every meal, and everything in between, and see nothing wrong with that for days on end.

Isn't there a point, though, where that becomes too much? Don't you need time to yourself, or at the very least time to interact with someone else on a non-romantic level?

I'm not saying girls shouldn't spend time with their significant others. More power to you, sister. He is probably your best friend, and who wouldn't want to spend time with their best friend? But consider not spending so much time with him.

Take time for yourself. Spend time with your friends or your family.

By spending so much time with your significant other, you are not allowing yourself to function independently anymore. You are so obsessed with and so attached to one person, and so dependent on them for happiness and contentment. That's not healthy, for you or for him.

Realize that you need breaks and that functioning independently outside of the relationship is completely normal.

I've witnessed friends get into relationships and soon they are with their boyfriend all the time, for every second, forgetting the people who were around before him in exchange for this heart-eyes, gushy love that may not last.

Don't do that.

Spend time apart, don't get dependent, and check up on your friends. (They matter, too!)

There is more to life than the boy who has you all starry-eyed and blushing. Be your own person. Being with the boy that you love oh-so much is just a perk.

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