Now before you bring out the torch and pitchfork on me, let me explain. I'm just as much of a fan of moms as the next person is - they are the living and breathing superheroes among us. I was raised by two great parents, and as much as I love, appreciate, and respect my dad, there are just some things that moms are the undisputed champions of. My mom taught me how to be strong and stand on my own two feet instead of having to rely on a man. She taught me how to take care of myself and when to give myself a little TLC. She taught me how to not lose myself in this world and to hold steadfast, despite all of the obstacles I'd face.She taught me that if I made God the center of my life, I would not and could not fail. She taught me to be the most passionate, loving and selfless version of me I could be.
This brings me to my point - moms know basically everything, but they don't always know what's best. For years, I wanted to be a neonatal nurse...or so I thought. My family is made up of anything and everything medical, from nurses to pharmacy technicians to CNA's to Alzheimer's specialists. I assumed the medical field was the path I was destined for too, especially since my mom told me that since I was young, I had a special gift for helping those who couldn't help themselves. It wasn't until I fell in love with something else that I realized that the field of medicine and math and science and early mornings was not for me. As much as I wish my newfound love was for something practical like technology or architecture or engineering, it just wasn't. It was for theatre, the laughingstock of one too many conversations. From the day I tried out for The Crucible my freshman year of high school, I knew that was what God had called me to do. I wanted to use my gift in the theatricals arts to tell the stories of those that couldn't. I wanted to show little boys and girls of color that they were meant for something more than a life behind bars or six feet below. I wanted to show that even in some of the dimmest and darkest depths of humanity, there was always a small glimmer of hope. I wanted to change the world.
The only thing keeping me from winning that Oscar I dreamed of on a nightly basis was telling my mom that I'd choose to spend twelve hours a day rehearsing for a show that I'd only be chorus or ensemble in than head a NICU unit. I spent a majority of my senior year of high school trying to come up with a really low key, cute, funny way to tell her that her dream of having a child in the neonatal profession was just that, a dream. But that didn't happen because there was a nuclear explosion in my house the day I told her and for days to come. The career path I was choosing was not practical, not stable or steady, not her baby girl, and in her words, "this is not what's best for you." In my heart though, I knew she was wrong. I knew that although the choice I was making was risky and unreliable and out of character for me, it was MY choice. It was such a hard thing for me to do to hurt her like that, but I knew that if I didn't pursue this passion of mine, I'd resent myself for the rest of my life. Eighty years of looking at myself in the mirror and getting pissed off at the coward I saw just wasn't worth it. In time, my mom came around to my life choice and supports me to the ends of the earth. And in time, I became happier than I'd ever been in my life - I became the most passionate, loving and selfless version of me I could be. Mothers may not always know best, but they'll always know how to love you better than anyone else.
