Anyone who truly knows me is aware that I hate mornings with a burning passion. My academic productivity is at its highest anytime past 9:00 p.m. because I usually get a second wind of energy. It’s fantastic. There’s also something awesome about texting your friend for a Wendy’s run at 2 a.m. Is Wendy’s as cool at 7 a.m.? No. So, this is what morning is like for a night person. Spoiler alert: it sucks.
The first stage of this monstrosity starts before the day before even ends. Setting your alarm for the next morning. Having to set an alarm to wake up in the morning is already placing your wonderful night’s sleep in the hands of a small handheld device (aka my phone) instead of waking up by the graces of your own free will. It goes downhill from there. You feel your soul dying slowly with every fifteen minutes you have to set your alarm back. I already have to wake up before 12, don’t make it worse. I beg of you.
Then after you've hit snooze five times you finally have to face the fact that you need to wake up to grace the morning with your unhappy presence. Seriously, I'm sorry for anyone who has to see me right when I wake up (shoutout to my roommates for putting up with me. I am deeply sorry). I have to aggressively throw my comforter off of me and turn on the lights in my room in order to truly accept that I have to get up and function as a human being. It's such a horrible moment -- leaving my bed to do...real things. It's awful.
After you've managed to get yourself together and socially presentable, the next stage is finding any sort of caffeinated beverage. Without it you die. The end. Not really but it feels like it. For me, that's coffee. Regular -- sometimes an overpriced latte with a couple extra shots of espresso if I'm feelin' a little dangerous -- half and half cream with one packet of sugar. Boom. That will get me as ready to fight the day as humanly possible. It doesn't work that well, but, you know, it's all I have to look forward to right when I wake up.
Next you have to face the dreaded thing you had to wake up at this ungodly hour of the morning for. For me that is class. You try desperately to pay attention to what your professor is saying, but there are times that you can't actually keep your eyelids open. It is the biggest struggle to be engaged in the discussion when you feel like you're pretty much still sleeping, but you have to try. That's what the coffee is for. Maybe bring a pop tart. Get that sugar rush too. Anything to keep your eyelids from threatening to fall every 10 seconds. Do what you must.
After said class -- or other obligation that is inconsiderate of your night person mentality -- you have two options: Continue fighting through your day like everything is rainbows and sunshine. Maybe grab a sandwich-- you're probably still hungry because I know you skipped breakfast to sleep more. You need nutrition to wake you up. Sometimes that actually helps. If it does, you're golden. Keep at it, bud, the morning shall not win! Or, sometimes you just have to throw the towel before the day has really even begun -- go take a well earned nap. You deserve it. You got up, put pants on, and somehow got through your morning obligation. No shame in giving up and sleeping more. I respect you.
