"Judgy parenting" is popular in the parenting world, especially with the growing presence of parenting advice through social media. Parenting 'wars' have stemmed from this in relation to hot topics. Breastfeeding versus formula, attached parenting versus detached(?) or cry-it-out(?) parenting... the list goes on. Moms stake out their opinions on these issues and are certain of their certainty; there can be no other right way. I'm typically a parent that rather than choosing to be judgy, I have a 'live and let live' mentality. However, I'm not perfect, and while I will agree that the 'live and let live' approach is an awesome approach, when taken to its extremes, it can become a problematic — even dangerous — endorsement.

First, let me just say that I know we all parent differently. I am absolutely a parent who doesn’t always follow conventional ways — I have co-slept with my 16-month-old son since the day we came come from the hospital, I breastfed as long as my body would allow me too, and I refuse to spank my child. Because of that, I can respect the different ways we choose to raise our children. But what I cannot accept is when other parents choose to act irresponsibly and ignore very important information that parents should be knowledgeable of.

Let me be clear — I do not judge those who simply just don’t know the correct or proper car seat safety rules and laws. However, I do judge those who are aware of these guidelines or laws and simply ignore them, and defend their negligence despite the knowledge about neglected car seat safety that we have today.

Let me start by sharing some excuses I have heard from other parents:

"She/he cried a lot because she/he didn’t like being backward, so I turned the car seat around early."

"Well I know we aren’t supposed to put coats on them in the car seats, but it’s such a pain to warm the car up ahead of time."

"Her/his legs are too long and touch the back of the seat, I don’t want her/his legs to break." "My parents didn't have these guidelines when I was a kid and I turned out just fine."

"My pediatrician told me I could."

"It’s not a law.”

So wait… would you let your kid do something dangerous just because they were crying about it? Not put sunscreen on them because it took extra time? Would you let your kid eat expired food just because you didn’t want to buy new food? Would you start operating a power tool you had no idea how to use if the risk of using it wrong was death?

Yeah, I know that all sounds a little ridiculous — but so do your excuses!

Car seat safety has laws, and pediatricians aren’t specialized in car seat safety, they are specialized in medicine, which is why we have car seat technicians. Also, while the minimum age to safely forward face a car seat may not be 2 years of age in your state yet (the legislative process is slow), the minimum age is 2 in other states across the U.S. With that said, wouldn’t you think that MAYBE these laws are in place for a reason — crazy theory, I know!

Did you know...

The guideline of "20 pounds and 1 year old" as the minimum legal standard for when car seats can safely be turned around has been updated? The AAP (American Association of Pediatrics) guidelines actually state that children need to remain in a rear-facing car seat until a minimum age of 2. This means the responsibility now lies with the parents to be up to date on current car seat research and also make choices for their children that reflect this.

When the number-two cause of childhood deaths ages 1-4 is as a result of a motor vehicle accident, parents should be taking the time to learn the correct way to restrain their children. If you can’t do that, then you are knowingly risking their life and that is unacceptable.

Can we take a minute to go over some widely accepted facts and statistics?

• Car seats reduce the risk of fatality by 71 percent for infants and 54 percent for toddlers.
• Booster seats reduce the risk of serious injury in children ages 4 to 8 by 45 percent.
• Children who are moved to seat belts before their recommended ages are four times more likely to suffer a serious head injury than if they were properly restrained in a booster seat.
• “The overall critical misuse for car seats is about 73 percent”

Are you freaking serious?

In a country where the majority of parents agonize over choosing the perfect pediatrician, the perfect preschool for their child to attend, and whether or not the food that they feed their families is organic, and you’re telling me that 73 percent of us can’t take the time to figure out how to use a car seat?

I have a huge problem with this.

And here is why: because car seat errors are nothing more than irresponsibility and laziness.

These are your children for crying out loud! These are the little humans that we worry about every second of their lives. We pick them up and kiss their scrapes and bruises when they are hurt, we take them to the doctor when they are sick, we teach them not to play with fire or to run across the street without looking both ways. We spend most of our lives preparing them for their future, but yet when it comes to the #2 cause of all childhood deaths ages 1-4 — riding unsafely in a car — parents think it’s ok to just cut corners and ignore guidelines made to save their child’s life?

This is absolutely ridiculous

Call me judgmental, I do not care. Because if you are knowingly putting your child at risk and not doing anything about it, then yes, I am judging you. I simply refuse to accept parental laziness when it comes to the safety of their child. Being a parent is hard, it’s so hard. There are so many things that we have to worry about, mouths to feed, laundry to fold, dishes to wash, and sometimes there just aren’t enough hours in a day to get everything done, but car seats are not where we should cut corners.

The rules are simple and you can find them here!

So, with all that said, yes, if I see you putting your kid in a car seat wrong, I WILL say something. Get it together parents, your children's lives are depending on it. Please be smart, educate yourself on child car seat safety.

Reminder — we are approaching the colder months and it is common for parents to strap their child into their car seat with their winter jackets on. However, Bulky clothes and winter jackets should NOT be worn when the child is buckled in because in the event of an accident, those clothes will become compressed and your child may slip out of the harness.