When I was a kid, my sisters would always call me "gringo"- a slang term for Caucasian people used in Mexico.
They would always tell me that since I was born in the United States, I wasn't actually Mexican, and what was just a harmless joke between siblings stuck with me the rest of my 18 years of life, convincing me that I wasn't Mexican, and that I wouldn't fit in if I lived in Mexico.
I never really felt as though I was Mexican until recently, when I realized I'm proud of my Mexican blood, and that I love being Mexican.
Although I grew up in a very Mexican household, eating tortillas with eggs for breakfast instead of toast, I never felt connected to my roots.
I felt like this until I watched the movie "Coco", which is a movie about a Mexican boy named Miguel who goes to the land of the dead to meet his great-great-grandfather. Just the opening Disney logo with a mariachi version of "When you wish upon a star" was enough to stir up emotions and make my heart skip a beat. As the movie progressed and showed a true representation of the beauty of the festivities during the Day of the Dead, I fell more and more in love with my culture.
The small fire that was there became a bonfire that engulfed me with love and pride for Mexico.
After that, I began to listen to Mexican music that my mom listened to. More specifically, Natalia Lafourcade and other Mexican folkloric music. "La Llorona", one of Mexico's most popular songs, became my most listened to song for a couple weeks, and I learned it on the guitar because something urged me to. Mexican music invaded my heart, from some of Mexico's famous composers, to mariachi music, to narcocorrido, which is music that tells the tale of drug traffickers in Mexico.
But one of my favorite Mexican artists is the world-famous Carlos Santana, ranked 20 on Rolling Stones list of greatest guitarists in the world. Reading Carlos Santana's autobiography "The Universal Tone" truly made me realize the beauty of Mexican culture and the passion that's put into everything.
I miss Mexico for so many reasons.
I miss the food, I miss traveling in taxis, walking around the port and smelling the barbacoa and carne asada.
Although I was never born there, I feel homesick every time I think of my experiences in Mexico. One of my fondest memories of Mexico was eating seafood in Veracruz at a table surrounded by my family, who all live in Mexico.
Ever since I realized that where I was born does not matter when it came to my true ethnicity, I've been wanting to cook more Mexican food, speak more Spanish, and play more Mexican music on the guitar.
I love my country, and I love the fact that I have Mexican blood running through my veins.
"Ay, ay, ay, ay, canta y no llores, porque cantanto se alegran, cielito lindo, los dos corazones."