"I've lost people and found them again. The second time around, things just made more sense. Honestly, timing has a lot to do with everything. Sometimes you aren't ready for each other yet."
It all begins with shared promises that go something along the lines of "if neither of us are married by (insert age here), we'll marry each other". While at the time you both may say it jokingly, overtime it becomes your hoped for reality.
You've given up trying to explain how you feel on the matter because you quickly are looked at as if you're crazy. No one can understand why you hold onto an idea of someone when you have ample opportunity to be with wonderful people who are standing right in front of you. You may date other people casually, maybe even seriously. You toy with the idea of loving another but time after time you still wonder about them. You wonder if they will ever return. You're curious as to if they think about you as often as you think about them, or even at all. Maybe it's been a week since you've talked. Maybe it's been a month. Maybe it's been a year. As time goes by they continue to live their life while you continue to live yours.
Some may view this kind of love as a curse. Some may view it as a blessing. Some may just call you plain stupid. Like, hello, get over them. It is not easy believing in someone that you're not always sure believes in you. It is a challenge to see them in the best possible light even when they make it hard to. You won't listen to the ones who tell you "you can't fix them, you need to let go", because you don't view them as someone that you need to fix. You know that's only something they can do. Everyone has to go through certain phases in life, yourself included. No matter what they do or what they say there will always be that part of you that cares and hopes for the best. Not for you or your hoped for relationship, but for them. You know the person that they are, not just the person they have been. You know the potential that they have and all you can do is hope they get there. No matter how much you want to remind them or help them see their worth, ultimately it is up to them.
It's not their fault you feel the way that you do. It's not your fault either. You're well aware of the chance that in the end it may never be. You've most likely tried letting go many times, but to no avail. A part of you somewhere deep in your gut just won't let you. You don't consider it being naive, just hopeful.
The thing to remember is: your love life is your own, no one can tell you how to feel. When it comes to relationships you always hear the saying: "when you know, you know". This usually comes hand in hand with couples who are madly in love, engaged, married, or at the very least: dating. In your mind you say the same, except the one you know about is kind of MIA. So what are you supposed to do?
Live your life, creating the best version of yourself that you can. Although they may have some changes and growing up to do, it may be that you do as well. It's easy to point the finger on them and feel as though they're the problem. We all have traits we can work on throughout our lives. No one has it all figured out. So instead of focusing your energy on how you wish they would see themselves the way you do, maybe you should do the same for yourself. When you think back on the person you were a few years ago and compare to who you are now, it makes sense. You never know the different people that you will come across and leave an impact on along the way.
When it's not working right now, there's a reason. Maybe you're just not ready for each other yet.
(funzug.com)
