Fast, that is the only word I can think of… It all felt too fast. It was as if nothing could happen slow enough for me. I know it sounds cliche but It was like I blinked, and I had already known him for a year. I had loved him for a year. That is, of course as a friend-mostly. I am waiting to truly love someone in a special way until there is a commitment, or rather, trying to. Somehow it had already been a year of loving someone, someone who is nothing but a stranger. It is fairly comparable to falling in love with a movie star; yet you have known all along that you have no chance. This is different. I have so many chances. Meeting a Stranger. It is full of chances.
There are chances for many things I fear deeply to occur. I could physically get hurt. I mean, I am driving five hours to meet a complete stranger… One of my coworkers literally calls him the Craigslist murderer. I also fear that he could meet me and realize I am not enough for him, I will never be enough.
No. To answer what you are all thinking, I did not meet him on craigslist. Well, actually, the way we met is literally the same as cinderella’s. I’m not talking the disney princess… it is pretty much the story of Lizzie Mcguire in “Another Cinderella Story”.
I met him in my generation’s version of a chat room, it was actually Yik Yak, embarrassingly enough. I made a post about my ideals on dating the Godly way and we just got to talking. And then, in a flash it had already been a year and he and I had talked almost non-stop. I cared about him more than most people in my life. He is one of the first people I want to tell anything to.
I can not believe I just wrote that, I kind of make myself want to roll my eye with how cliche I am. I just don’t know how else to explain what he meant to me…
Meant.
Here I was, it had been a year and he had let me down.
I get goosebumps when I start to formulate in my head how to explain how this man let me down.
I get tears in my eyes
I get shaky
I get dizzy
I get a rose hue on my cheeks
I get a smile on my face
He let me down by loving me
He let me down by staying in my life through everything
He let me down by telling me I was enough every single day.
He let me down by not living up to my expectations
He changed them
Yes, he let me down
But in the process he brought me up
It had been this wonderful year with and without him... without him because I still had not met him. I had this constant pit in my stomach because it was too perfect to be true. HE was too perfect to be true. I couldn’t have this wonderful person want to stay in my life this long without even meeting me. Could I?
It was time. Time to let go of my fear that I would meet him and everything would be lost.
I was going to do it.
Meeting a stranger
I go back to this word; fast.
I was, at that moment, more than ready to meet him, yet I was scared out of my mind to be driving hundreds of miles to meet this stranger. This stranger I cared for more than almost anything.
I finally got there after five hours of driving
I asked him a huge favor, to “come find me”
He did.
Once again I was let down
It was perfect (despite being that one stupid word, of course; fast.)
I actually met his family and I loved them. They were some of the most fantastic people I had ever met. They were intelligent beyond belief, kind, and welcomed me… some stranger into their home.
They, too, were-
Meeting a stranger
Meeting a stranger is something I will never regret, it was one of the best days.
January second, two thousand seventeen is a day I will remember forever
It was a day I met my stranger
