For a while in high school, I wasn’t really my happy-go-lucky self. I was dark. And not the dark like the way you think of emo bands. I was dark in my mind. I hated myself. I hated who I was. Part of it was because of the things I had been through but a lot of it was my own self-confidence.
After overcoming a problematic part of my life, I decided to actually think about myself for once. I knew what I wanted to do. I knew what school I wanted to go to. I knew partially what I wanted to do with my life. I knew what to do to make myself happy.
Look, I’m a firm believer in loving who you are and always thinking positively. I know that sometimes, it’s extremely hard. There are so many things working against you. Life may seem bleak and sad. But if you really, really put your mind to working on yourself, it can really help.
In high school, I was diagnosed with depression. This is something that altered the way I lived. From being on medication to getting off medication to getting back on medication, I’ve been through it all. It was when I was 16. I’m 20 now and I just recently started getting off of the medication again. The biggest step for me was realizing who I was and taking a step back to look at myself in the big picture.
“Do I need that person in my life?”
“Is this something that will benefit me?”
“Am I happy?”
The biggest question. Am I happy? And I wasn’t. I wasn’t happy for a very long time. That was until I started doing things to make me happy. Surrounding myself with good influences and good people brought my spirits up. For a long time, I always wanted to be with other people because when I was alone, I was with my own thoughts. And that scared me. But being with other people brought other things to my life, other memories of fun and exciting things. Eventually, I started to be alone more. Now, I actually enjoy my alone time.
The biggest step for me, personally, was loving myself. It’s definitely okay to be on medication. It’s definitely okay if you get off of said medication and have to get back on. It’s definitely okay to be depressed. But it’s working on who you are that will ultimately benefit you. At least, it worked for me. And I know, this kind of stuff doesn’t work for all people. But it’s worth a try.
Loving yourself means looking in the mirror every morning and not worrying about flaws.
Loving yourself means positively thinking about your future.
Loving yourself means making choices to benefit you.
Loving yourself means loving who you are.
I love every flaw, every imperfection in personality, and every quirk. I love myself. I’m positive now. All it took was a look at myself.
