Mascot Rankings: MLB
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The World Series is upon us and that's fun and all, but we've seen that before. Two teams duking it out for one to come out on top- that's old news. Instead of battling for the most runs, they should be battling for best mascot, because there's some doozies among the bunch. I'm ranking all 30 of the MLB mascots (in their ability to fight it out), and this is a little trickier than my usual mascot articles. Most of these teams have a general name and logo to represent them but an entirely different mascot that runs around the stadium. I'm sort of just taking that all into account, because this is my article, and I make the rules.

30. Cleveland Indians

https://twitter.com/Indians/status/1300452812422250497/photo/3

Mascot: Indians/ Slider (Whatever the heck that is)

My Ranking: 30- Change your name & logo to something less offensive, then we'll talk.

29. Atlanta Braves

https://twitter.com/Braves/status/1131919874668867584/photo/1

Mascot: Braves/ Blooper (Another nondescript monster thing)

My Ranking: 29- If you look up the meaning behind this name, I don't know if it's much better than the last one.

28. Oakland Athletics

https://twitter.com/ForTheWin/status/873903915498176512/photo/1

Mascot: Athletics/ Stomper (Why couldn't they just be the Oakland Elephants? I love elephants)

My Ranking: 28- It feels like they set the bar really low here.

27. Cincinnati Reds

https://twitter.com/Reds/status/1311699451803820034/photo/2

Mascot: Reds/ Gapper (couldn't find a good picture)

My Ranking: 27- I'm not going to lie, this name had me a little worried, but they checked out. It's in reference to their socks, and they aren't the only ones.

26. Boston Red Sox

https://twitter.com/NESN/status/1090386189788631040/photo/1

Mascot: Red Sox/ Wally (Kind of looks like Oscar the Grouch)

My Ranking: 26- Them too.

25. Chicago White Sox

https://twitter.com/Southpaw/status/1302662142118723585/photo/1

Mascot: White Sox/ Southpaw (Someone on the White Sox marketing/media team needs a raise lol)

My Ranking: 25- And them. I like socks as much as the next person but naming a whole team after them seems like a stretch.

24. New York Mets

https://twitter.com/WEWS/status/870235540691369985/photo/1

Mascot: Mets/ Mr. Met (My dude has one big head)

My Ranking: 24- Isn't 'metropolitan' more of like an overarching theme than something concrete? Who comes up with these things?

23. Philadelphia Phillies

https://twitter.com/CBSNews/status/1009772860896960514/photo/1

Mascot: Phillies/ The Phillie Phanatic

My Ranking: 23- Sort of lazy naming here, but I aspire to have as long of eyelashes as this guy.

22. Washington Nationals

https://twitter.com/Nationals/status/1307768522660024325/photo/1

Mascot: Nationals/ Screech (couldn't find a good picture)

My Ranking: 22- one word... meh.

21. New York Yankees

https://twitter.com/Cut4/status/1253010231615000577/photo/3

Mascot: Yankees/ Dandy (They don't use him anymore though)

My Ranking: 21- You mean the people that make candles?

20. Los Angeles Dodgers

https://twitter.com/MLBStats/status/1317600372127637504/photo/1

Mascot: Dodgers

My Ranking: 20- The first of our 2 teams actually in the World Series, so I'll give them a little bit more credit.

19. San Diego Padres

https://twitter.com/Padres/status/1316806202089594880/photo/1

Mascot: Padres/ The Swinging Friar (couldn't find a good picture)

My Ranking: 19- If you translate it to literally mean "parents", then honestly that's a pretty terrifying opponent.

18. Milwaukee Brewers

https://twitter.com/Cut4/status/1310350613679616001/photo/1

Mascot: Brewers/ Bernie Brewer (couldn't find a good picture)

My Ranking: 18- I don't really know what a brewer is, but I vibe with this picture.

17. Colorado Rockies

https://twitter.com/Rockies/status/1314633055370321922/photo/1

Mascot: Rockies/ Dinger (Barney's got nothing on this purple dinosaur)

My Ranking: 17- A mountain range is pretty formidable- they don't do much though.

16. Minnesota Twins

https://twitter.com/Twins/status/1311030744102428677/photo/1

Mascot: Twins/ T.C. Bear (couldn't find a good picture)

My Ranking: 16- What pair of twins are we talking about? The Property Brothers? The Olsens?

15. Kansas City Royals

https://twitter.com/Sluggerrr/status/927591434093547520/photo/1

Mascot: Royals/Sluggerrr (A literal lion king)

My Ranking: 15- They're cool enough to have a Lorde song named after them.

14. Toronto Blue Jays

https://twitter.com/BlueJays/status/1311066459964149762/photo/4

Mascot: Blue Jays/ Ace (couldn't find a good picture)

My Ranking: 14- Finally, some actual mascots that match their namesake.

13. St. Louis Cardinals

https://twitter.com/Cardinals/status/1287568525608062976/photo/1

Mascot: Cardinals/ Fredbird (A++++ on name)

My Ranking: 13- This picture is some ideal social distancing.

12. Baltimore Orioles

https://twitter.com/OrioleBird/status/1101607771403943936/photo/1

Mascot: Orioles/ The Oriole Bird (Can we give it a better name though? Come on, people)

My Ranking: 12- I might have just realized that an oriole was a bird earlier this year.

11. Miami Marlins

https://twitter.com/ChicagoSports/status/961313618137526273/photo/1

Mascot: Marlins/ Billy the Marlin (what you'd expect)

My Ranking: 11- Let's have more aquatic mascots- they're fun.

10. Tampa Bay Rays

https://twitter.com/TB_Times/status/870856486129291265/photo/1

Mascot: Rays/ Raymond (Excuse me, sir. This is not what this animal looks like)

My Ranking: 10- Now, we have the other World Series team. That's all I really have to say.

9. Chicago Cubs

https://twitter.com/Cubs/status/1021093006324191233/photo/1

Mascot: Cubs/ Clark the Cub (What a wholesome, friendly face)

My Ranking: 9- Would be higher, but this is just a baby.

8. Arizona Diamondbacks

https://twitter.com/Dbacks/status/1309638609926983680/photo/1

Mascot: Diamondbacks/ Baxter the Bobcat (Now, may someone explain to me why they don't have a snake mascot)

My Ranking: 8- All jokes aside, that is dope that they have a pool at the stadium.

7. Texas Rangers

https://twitter.com/FOXSportsSW/status/1273434130978463744/photo/1

Mascot: Rangers/ Rangers Captain (Those kids seem to like him)

My Ranking: 7- When I hear ranger, I think of Walker, Texas Ranger, and not much can beat Chuck Norris.

6. Seattle Mariners

https://twitter.com/Mariners/status/1314704696200708098/photo/2

Mascot: Mariners/ Mariner Moose (couldn't find a good picture)

My Ranking: 6- It's just fancy talk for sailor. Still a good choice though.

5. Pittsburgh Pirates

https://twitter.com/theinclinepgh/status/972260746363990016/photo/1

Mascot: Pirates/ Pirate Parrot (Must be DH-ing here)

My Ranking: 5- Arrrrrrrgh we almost done yet?

4. Detroit Tigers

https://twitter.com/JKryk/status/886278742678671361/photo/4

Mascot: Tigers/ Paws (Look at its shoes- WHAT ARE THOSE?!?!)

My Ranking: 4- My brain is maxed out on tiger jokes. If your team has a tiger mascot, whether it be pro, college, or freaking little league, I automatically hate it.

3. San Francisco Giants

https://twitter.com/jcfphotog/status/1309723250046373888/photo/1

Mascot: Giants/ Lou Seal (What a king wearing his mask)

My Ranking: 3- And we're not talking jolly green.

2. Los Angeles Angels

https://twitter.com/Angels/status/1318314923076718592/photo/1

Mascot: Angels

My Ranking: 2- Anyone else watch Angels in the Outfield as a kid?

1. Houston Astros

https://twitter.com/McCannSportsLaw/status/1115828072421449728/photo/1

Mascot: Astros/ Orbit (Alright, the baseball ear/antennae situation we have going on here is adorable)

My Ranking: 1- Well, it didn't end well for the dinosaurs (Watch out, Dinger).

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