Have you ever been a situation where you’re like, “Wow I really want a relationship. I’m ready. I’m gonna find the one.” Then a potential guy or gal starts talking to you and you’re like, “Wow they are so nice and totally have potential.” Then you proceed to hang out with them a couple of times and there is absolutely nothing wrong with them, but you completely lose interest. But then the other person ends up gaining a stronger interest in you, so you’re confronted with the task of *clears throat* - the friend zone. Why are you like this?
Well listen up, because you’re not alone. Luckily I’ve gained some knowledge about this stuff thanks to my PSY 374 Human Sexuality Psychology class, aka College Sex Ed. In addition to learning about various –philias and -isms, forms of contraception, and sex positions, I’ve also learned about the 6 different styles of love. Although I definitely do not have my PhD in this subject, I’d like to share this info because I know y’all can relate in some way.
First of all, here are the 6 styles of love and a short description of each:
1. Eros – a romantic love
2. Mania – an obsessive love
3. Ludus – a playful love
4. Pragma – a practical or logical love
5. Storge – an affectionate/familial love
6. Agape – an unconditional love
I’m no doctor, but if you could relate to the first paragraph, there’s a high possibility you’re style of love is Ludus. You might be shocked that there’s even a classification for this type of love. You may have thought only those douchebag dudes you met in high school or college felt this way about relationships and love… but oh no it can happen to anyone.
Let me explain this style further. Those who love in the Ludus way usually view love as a game where it’s all about “winning” or getting someone to like you back. Nothing is taken very seriously. The person usually loses interest after the person starts to like them back, because to them, they got the W so they can end whatever they had with the other person. Even though statistically men score higher with the Ludus style, women can also be in this category.
I hope this information was relieving for those of you that can relate. In the words of Taylor Swift, “The players gonna play, play, play, play, play” and if you’re the player in this case, you do you boo, 'cause same here.