Alzheimer’s is one of the hardest diseases to watch. It robs you of your loved ones and turns them into someone else. It takes away one’s stability and replaces it with confusion and disorientation. Approximately 5.4 Million Americans have Alzheimer’s.
It’s not them, it's the disease.
When someone develops Alzheimer’s or dementia, you may notice not only memory loss but changes in mood and personality. It’s important, as a loved one or friend of someone struggling with the disease, to know the difference between what personality changes are because of the disease. Having interacted with someone who has dementia, I know from personal experience that it is extremely hard to not take things personally, especially when the disease can make them into someone you don’t recognize. Just understand they are sick, but your time with them is not over.
Be patient.
Patience is key, taking a deep breath every now and then is so important when interacting with someone who has Alzheimer's. The disease can make life a little unpredictable and sometimes shocking. Love your loved one unconditionally. Instead of being oppositional, just go with it. It’s hard not to get upset with the backlash the disease may bring on. Despite the negatives, don't be afraid to make light of the situation. A little laugh can go a long way.
There will be good days and bad days.
There is no sugar coating it. This disease is hard for everyone involved, but forgive and forget because there will be good and bad days no matter what. Allow yourself and the people around you a learning curve. Don't be hard on yourself, because there is no perfect answer. Learning to react and treat your loved one the correct way is the best you can do, and just know that no matter how hard you try, there will still be bad days and that's OK.
Allow them to keep their identity.
Alzheimer's strips so much from its victims, so allowing your loved one to keep their identity is so crucial in the transition. There will be things that they can no longer do, such as drive, maybe live alone or cook. Things that they have done their whole life will be taken from them. Allow them to do what they are still capable of, even if its seems insignificant to you. Even though their behavior and abilities are changing doesn't take away the fact that they are still adults, and no one wants to be treated as if they can't do anything.
Don’t let go of the good years.
One thing to always remember when watching a loved one who struggles with Alzheimer's is to reminisce about funny and happy moments you shared with them. It may be bleak in the moment at times, but hold your memories close, write them down, remember daily what you love about them. Depending on the case and progression, some people may only be struggling with short-term memory loss and a great way to connect with them again would be to talk about past experiences. You may be surprised at what they remember.
Find the right care.
Finding the right care and situation is so important to the success of an Alzheimer’s patient. Finding a balance between keeping as much independence as they can handle all the while making sure their needs are being taken care of may be one of the most important parts.
