On March 4th, 2016 I found out my grandma had cancer.
Sometimes in life we have these moments where the world seems to stop in it’s tracks. Everything seems to stand still and you’re left alone with your thoughts. This was one of those moments. I remember exactly where I was. I remember every part of the conversation. My heart sunk. The tears wouldn’t stop coming. I instantly started to prepare for the worst because, you know, Google said people with lung cancer don’t usually make it.
It’s not just the ‘cancer’ word that’s scary. You hear the word ‘chemotherapy’ and you cringe because you know what that entails. You know the pain that comes with it, and your heart aches knowing your loved one will have to endure it. There’s nothing fun about losing all of your hair, feeling nauseous and dizzy all day long, experiencing chronic pain, getting blood transfusions, and having to use plastic silverware because you always have a metal taste in your mouth. You know how weak they’re about to become, but you know how important it is that you remain positive, even if that seems like the hardest thing in the world.
We are now three treatments away from being done and this journey has been the most life changing experience, and not in the way I had imagined it would. I thought I would share some of the ways in which I am forever changed by loving someone with cancer, and the lessons I’ve learned along the way.
1. Life has new meaning
There’s beauty in every single day. There’s potential in every single breath we take. Make the most of it without even thinking about what could happen tomorrow. Those things you’ve always wanted to do, do them. You’re alive today. That’s reason enough to jump for joy.
2. Strength knows no limits
There’s no one on earth stronger than someone battling cancer. Seriously. The things they go through mentally and physically on a daily basis are unmatched. If they can be strong in the face of cancer, you can be strong in the face of whatever it is you’re going through.
3. It’s all about the mindset
Think positive thoughts and positive things will happen. We’ve all heard it before. But I now know firsthand how powerful a positive mindset can be. Whatever obstacle you’re facing, put a positive face on it and watch how everything changes.
4. People come into your life right when you need them
We’ve met so many people throughout this journey. It’s almost as if my grandma’s chemo nurses were her angels on earth and the other patients were her soul mates. You never know who will walk into your life when you need them most, and you might not even know you need them. But you do. And those are the people you need to hold onto for life.
5. Family is everything
Knowing you have undying support is key to overcoming anything in life. I’m not sure what my grandma would’ve done without the endless prayers, cards in the mail, and phone calls. Appreciate your family for all they do for you and for simply being there to hold you up when all you want to do is fall.
6. Hard times are temporary
It gets better. Sometimes it gets worse before it gets better, but it does get better. It may seem hard now, but there are much better days ahead. After all, getting through all the bad stuff is what makes the good stuff great.
7. Smile at strangers and let them know you care
Why? Because just giving them a smile can brighten their whole day. You never know who might need that smile or who might need to hear that someone cares. It may be something small to you, but it could be something huge to someone else.
8. Sometimes deciding what to eat should be the only decision you make today
It’s OK to lay on your couch all day long. This was a hard one for my grandma to accept, but eventually she got the hang of it. Take some time off to just relax, rest, and refocus. Focus on you - and maybe what you want for dinner - but that’s it!
9. Love and laughter cure
We are down to our final three treatments and things are going great. As I look back on the past several months, I realize something. I have never witnessed so much love in my entire life. And I have never shared so many laughs with my grandma as I did during this process. Did the chemo help? Sure. But I truly believe love and laughter cured her cancer. So I will continue to love with all of my heart and laugh until it hurts every single day.
