Do you remember the pain of your first heartbreak? You probably don't because that is a moment we like to avoid because the pain was so gut-wrenching. It was that feeling of losing everything you know, that pain of laying on the bathroom floor crying and hopeless, being so upset that you make-yourself-sick kind of pain. It's a pain you wouldn't wish on anyone and when you see someone else going through that desperate moment, you can't help but to flash back to that moment in your life, and your mind will take you to uncertain places.
The thing about first loves is that they don't change, the feelings don't change, and you will probably never love like that again. It's a kind of love that you get lost in; you become naive, vulnerable, and playful, and you become a version of yourself that you have never seen, because your first love consumes you. I wish I could lie and say that one day it stops consuming you, but I am not sure that is true. When you bump into each other some time after you've been broken up, you get that guilty pleasure, bitter-sweet feeling, that giddy emotion that you used to share with each other once upon a time, and then that feeling changes to an overwhelming sensation of "what if." I would say this is why high school sweethearts get back together once they've been broken up for a while. That feeling of togetherness is so hard to pass up on. You remember all the good things and forget the reason you and your first love took separate paths in the first place.
Though first loves steal your heart and you feel like you will never get it back, I am pretty sure that you recover eventually (together or a part). I say this because my Dad is remarried to his best friend from grade school, and my Mom is remarried to her high school sweetheart. But regardless of all these emotions, the pain, the smiles, the laughs, the heartbreak, everything happens for a reason, and that's the most important thing to remember. My mom always says, "If it's meant to be it will work out." You broke up for a reason, he/she was your first love for a reason, and that could be because life isn't ready for the two of you together forever at that point, or it could be to train you for your next love. Regardless, from personal experience, the feeling of a first love doesn't change and sometimes you just have to acknowledge that, keep on going, and understand that first loves happen for a reason.
