Whether you are in a relationship or not, it is important to understand the concept of love and how everyone loves differently. We live in a world now where accepting on who we love and how we love is becoming less of a social issue. But it is still an issue.
We were all raised differently and express ourselves to that manner and when that happens there is some form of miscommunication. Some people may know about the "5 Love Languages", I honestly did not know about it until this passing month. For those who do not know, it is focusing on the positive way that we love someone. There is no "correct" language out of the 5. It is more about how do you love and find out how your partner loves and once those are announced it will be easier for y'all to communicate and actually do what the other person would like in the relationship.
The 5 love languages are: "Words of Affirmation", "Acts of Service", "Quality Time", "Receiving Gifts", and "Physical Touch". If you take the quiz here it will ask you some questions and tally out your results as to which language best suits you. This would completely explain why you may argue with your partner about them acting a certain way. As well as it may be a reason that you noticed that you act a certain way.
For me personally, my love language is "Words of Affirmation" which I find hilarious since I am an English major. Anyways, then my bottom one was "Physical Touch". So for me, I enjoy positive statements, words of appreciation, being told that I made someone proud. That lights up my spirits all the time. Compared to hand-holding, touching of the shoulder, hugging all the time. It is not exactly my cup of tea because it is not my love language. The physical touch will not equal out to me the same way as words would. Make sense?
If we don't acknowledge our own love language and we don't recognize our partner's, that is when the collision will hit. I like to watch Jay Shetty videos where he completely explains things like this all the time. He was a monk for 3 years so he had gained a lot of wisdom that I am ready to take on into my own life.
The relationship falls and burn because we are not listening to each other. We are so busy trying to put out our own opinions. As a society, we are "hearing" what others are saying, but we are not "listening" to what others are trying to tell us. By listening, we are growing our empathetic skills, we are becoming more nurturing.
So whether you are in a relationship or not, this all works for you. Love language can be dealt with a friend, a family member, even a pet. (yes the dogs need some love too!) In order for us to heal our world, I think one of our biggest struggles is not speaking the other person's language.
