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Lost Love

a story on how i had love, but lost it

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Lost Love

Sometimes life is not always the way you intend it should be. But who is to say, that somewhere down the road, it could be all you intended for it to be. Back in 2011, I had this amazing guy, and when i define amazing; i mean chivalrous. Nowadays it is hard to find a guy who will open doors for girls, or bring them flowers, or just tell them they are beautiful everyday. Not this guy, somehow chivalry was not ruined. He never had to do those things or say them, but he wanted to. And that is what made him so different from normal guys. I had that right in front of me, and let it go. Depression can be hard and can take a toll on someone. I had depression from a car accident that i had. So i was just down in the dumps and i didn't love myself. And if i didn't love myself, how could i expect him to love me; more importantly how could i expect myself to love him? I was not honest with him, and that took a toll. Now we look ahead a few years, and we both went separate ways. I don't think we can ever be friends. And i always used to blame myself for it, and yes it is my fault, but in some ways, he is to blame to. Life goes in so many different directions, and i think we both we our separate ways. He was worth fighting for, and i stupidly let the fight go. I went to Disney to find myself and find happiness. And yes, even though my life has took drastic changes for the better and i am happy with my life, i feel like their will always be a void. A what if? I don't like living my life with what ifs, i like to live in the moment. My head said let it go, but my heart said no. My only wish is he is living his life and is happy. And that is all i could want.

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