Have you ever had instances when you were unable to remember what you needed to? Ever been taking a test and studied for hours on end but still couldn't remember that very specific thing you were studying? Tried to remember memories of yourself from a few days ago or a few years ago or of others but you weren't able to? Thats what I have to deal with daily.
I am 21 years old and I have the mind of an 80 year old, I can hardly remember what I did a few hours ago sometimes and that seriously sucks. I am constantly asked about my childhood and things that have happened and I have to think really really hard in order for me to even remember small pieces of it. Most of the time I have to ask about a certain situation or have it described to me in order for me to even remember a small amount of it and even then it sometimes doesn't even work.
I think that when people tell me things that I don't remember I just sort of make up a scenario in my head. This is the same with photos, I view photos from my childhood and make up stories of what I thought happened and assume the outcomes. When I am asked about certain events that I don't recall such as a birthday or about my grandparents I have to think very hard in order to even remember a small glimpse of the memory.
Recently I had a person very close to me pass away, everyone was speaking about how they remember the first time they met them and I was at a loss for words. I couldn't recall that, or most memories I had from my time with this person and it made me very sad. I had to ask my boyfriend how I first told him I loved him and that one really hurt because I can hardly remember anything but that was something I should have REALLY remembered.
When I tell stories to people I get told that I am wrong about them and that the story went a different way, that is what I deal with when I cant remember exactly what happened in my life. That really hurts because I don't want my friends and family to think I am lying or that I cant remember important things that have happened or that I am lying. Life without these memories is really tough and I just want to know why I cant ever seem to remember things well.
One thing I am decent at remembering are birthdays, and names for the most part as well as faces. Oh and when I have been hurt or when something really amazing has happened to me in my life. Either way it is very important to address this situation, please tell me that I am not alone in this. I feel so lost and just wish that I was able to understand why I am so young yet have one of the worst memories of anyone I've ever met. It scares me.
