We’re at that point in our lives when some of our friends are starting to get married and it’s crazy. You’re super happy for them though. It’s just hard to believe that they are saying goodbye to the single life forever and making a commitment to another person for life when you are wondering what to have for lunch in a couple hours.
Undoubtedly, if you are in a long term relationship and you see your friends moving towards marriage, you start to question your own relationship. You wonder if where you are in your relationship is where you need to be and if marriage is in the near future. Whether you show it on the outside or not, on the inside it makes you nervous to think about making that commitment. Then you tell yourself, “Well technically I have already made the decision to commit to my significant other since we are dating for the intent of marriage right?” But no, the word marriage is frightening.
Seeing your peers get married doesn’t mean that they have their lives together. It doesn’t mean that you and I are living our lives wrong or not living it to the fullest. It’s okay to not be ready for marriage. We are young adults who have a lot to focus on in our lives right now. For me, I want to focus on school and preparing for a career while enjoying the freedom of college at the same time. That doesn’t mean that I don’t love or care about my boyfriend. It just shows that we are both in a place in our lives right now where marriage isn’t at the top of our priority list.
In my thoughts, I have concluded that there is no need to rush marriage because I have my whole life with this one person; the one person who I am still spending my life with before marriage. If who I am dating now is who I will marry then why not just sit back and enjoy where we are now? Does marriage seem like fun sometimes? Yes. Does it cross my mind sometimes? Obviously. But I don’t need it in my life right now.
In the end, I am caught up with being young like society wants us to be. I’m not against young marriages because some people can do it and that’s great, but I can’t. There is so much more for me to learn about myself and being in a relationship before I get married. The other day marked a year and a half for Ben and me. In my world, that’s a long time to be with someone and I’m still not ready to say “I do” to him and I think that’s perfectly okay. Being in a long term relationship (I’m assuming) means you plan on getting married in the future but there’s no rush.
“But for now we are young, let us lay in the sun and count every beautiful thing we can see.”
Neutral Milk Hotel//In The Aeroplane Over the Sea
