Pink is for girls, blue is for boys. This is how a large portion of our population has been raised to think. Gender roles are given to us way before we are born, and attached to those roles are labels or characteristics that help distinguish the difference between men and women. However, can these attributes really determine our behavior? How does sexuality come into play with the roles cast amongst genders?
Recently there has been a lot of media coverage concerning gender identity and sexuality, yet LGBTQ organizations have been trying to bring attention to these topics for ages.
Due to the breakthrough caused by news such as Caitlyn Jenner’s transformation, Target’s stance on gender neutral products, and recent celebrity coming out reports, the public has been forced to consume information they were unaware of or were not open to learning about. While many have shared their strong disagreements regarding these topics, many have embraced the changes and tolerance these cases are bringing about within society.
Caitlyn Jenner’s public transformation had to be one of the most talked about news generated by media outlets in recent events. No one would imagine this all around masculine athlete going from a he to an all feminine she. Which begs to question, what exactly distinguishes a man from a woman? After all, aren’t we trying to break the stigmas assigned to genders?
The simple answer to that first question is exploring and discovering one’s own gender identity. In her Diane Sawyer interview, Caitlyn, or Bruce at the time, explained that although he participated in the stereotypical men’s activities, he always felt like he only did those things as a way to mask what he felt inside. Her words during this interview has a greater effect in gender representation; just because you’re assigned a gender at birth, and just because that gender is tied to a role, it doesn’t mean that you can fit those facets of one’s being into an authentic being.
You might ask yourself: if that’s the case, why is she alternating herself into the stereotypical role of a woman? Caitlyn Jenner took the time to explore herself as a man in the general sense of the word, now she’s exploring her own identity as a woman through what it means to her. Gender identity is all about one's own perception. Caitlyn could have remained Bruce for the entirety of her life, with male organs and all, but she would have still identified as a female mentally and emotionally.
Gender identity isn’t always about how you live physically, it isn’t a matter of behavior, it’s a matter of whether you feel comfortable with distinguishing your sex with a counterpart. However, if discovering your gender identity is not something you want to discover through labels, it would be so much more simple if gender identity wasn’t associated to the roles we are suppose to take on.
Breaking down these social norms on gender roles would be a lot easier if we desensitized the public from gender binarism. It’s understandable to want to fit everything into categories; we like to do it to ourselves, using labels to define our sexuality, gender, race, economic status, etc. When we use labels on ourselves it makes it easier for people to define us, it makes it seem less chaotic, and it gives a structure to society. The importance of this is that it prevents others from erasing our background and the struggles fixed with it.
Despite the contrary, when we use labels to define us we are causing a fixed way of living, preventing others from finding their own identities on their own. Using labels is also one of the primary causes for stereotypes. The labels tied to genders promotes double standards, and the reason why certain behavior is only appropriate for a specific sex, while inappropriate for the others. If we began living on a gender neutral lifestyle these standards set between the genders wouldn’t have to exist. A woman who chooses to explore her sexuality as she pleases wouldn’t be slut shamed, and a man who chooses to wear products targeted for women wouldn’t be seen as a homosexual. Our gender system tells us that gender and sexuality are exclusive, but if we took a gender neutral stance that wouldn’t be the case at all.
When news broke out on Target’s decision to go gender neutral on children’s products, a pour of outrage followed. This was a sign of how intolerant our society is 'til this day. Many commenters have stated that they wouldn’t shop at Target anymore due to their belief that target is promoting confusion at a very early age. These are the same people afraid of change in our gender system, the same people who believe in the exclusivity of gender and sexuality.
Regardless of their belief, Target is actually doing some good. Target is causing an evolution on a way we see ourselves, while also giving us the opportunity to allow our children to make a choice on how they identify themselves. Going gender neutral means finding yourself, your likes and dislikes, being proud to express the things you find aesthetically pleasing. Going gender neutral is discovering your own identity without social restrictions. Gender neutrality avoids discrimination based on the impression that certain conduct is more suitable for one gender as opposed to the other.
With gender neutrality, we are presenting a future that tells our children that nothing is impossible as long as they have the ability for it and not the gender for it. We are allowing women to feel free to be androgynous without being thought of as a lesbian, and telling men that it is okay to wear makeup if it makes him feel more comfortable with himself, just to list a few examples.
People often associate sexuality when discussing the topic of gender identity. As soon as Bruce Jenner opened up about becoming Caitlyn Jenner, people were quick to question her sexuality. Although she had been married to three different women in the past, people still thought that if she was going from man to woman, she must have been gay during her time as a man. From most of the discussions I read or heard, people couldn’t fathom that maybe her attraction for women made her a lesbian even before she publicly declared herself as a woman. The general public also didn’t care to think that maybe after her transformation or even before it, she could see herself as sexually fluid.
Sexual fluidity isn’t often talked about, and can often be confused as bisexuality. In association to gender identity, sexual fluidity takes a neutral stance on sexual attraction toward any gender.
People often ignore that sexuality is a spectrum, and in that overall spectrum stands sexual fluidity. Although you might be predominantly attracted to a specific gender, if you are sexually fluid you are open to exploring your sexuality through non-gender binary standards. Being sexually fluid is taking pleasure and acceptance in your attraction toward the human specimen regardless of someone’s gender identity. Sexual fluidity correlates to a life without labels because those who are sexually fluid are taking on the freedom to explore their sexuality without having to express their sexual preference. Being sexually fluid can be showing preference towards one gender while open to all genders in sexual, emotional, and/or physical relationships.
The discussion of sexual fluidity has been encouraged by the recent statements made by Miley Cyrus and Kristen Stewart. In relation to gender neutrality and sexual fluidity, Miley Cyrus said that she doesn’t relate to a gender and doesn’t expect her partner to either.
Cyrus, who has been in relationships with men, and is now currently dating Victoria's Secret model, Stella Maxwell, also said “I am literally open to every single thing that is consenting and doesn't involve an animal and everyone is of age. Everything that's legal, I'm down with."
Kristen, who has been recently linked to visual effects producer, Alicia Cargile, chimed in on what it means to be sexually fluid. Stewart has been questioned about her sexuality for years, but although she’s always been private about her personal life, she admits that she isn’t hiding. “If you feel like you really want to define yourself, and you have the ability to articulate those parameters and that in itself defines you, then do it. But I am an actress, man. I live in the fucking ambiguity of this life and I love it,” Stewart said. She also believes that in a few years more people won’t feel the need to have to define their sexuality as long as they’re happy “doing their thing."
Having an open-minded attitude toward gender neutrality and sexual fluidity means showing a disregard to the gender binary norms. This way of thinking is showing respect to the people who want to form their own authentic lifestyle. If you feel the need to have your own life set into certain categories, that’s okay if it feels authentic to you, but it’s important to understand that there are people who feel happier doing the complete opposite. A happy future doesn’t necessarily mean a picketed white fence, while being married to someone of the opposite sex, and several children to bring up along with it. Not everyone feels the need to settle into the roles that should supposedly be assigned to our genders. Some people would like to appreciate the human anatomy and explore their identity without the restrictions or the judgement that comes along with the general perception of who we are told to be. We all have the right to live the most genuine facets of ourselves so as long as we aren’t intentionally hurting anyone. So, in the meantime, let’s leave the labels on the price tags and remove them from ourselves.
