I just got out of a three-year relationship. And for starters, this article isn't going to be about bashing the guy or talking about how horrible our relationship was. Because neither of those things are true. Sometimes, things just end.
It's a hard concept to explain to someone that my boyfriend and I broke up mutually and not dramatically. We just got to the point where we learned and grew as much as we could from each other. And that's okay.
I am really tired of hearing people my age saying that at this point of our lives, we should be dating to marry. I am a young adult. I want to have fun, be free, and do what makes me happy. And it wasn't until this end of my relationship that I realized that I need to live for me.
There isn't anything wrong with only wanting to date to marry. If that is what your goal in life is, than by all means go ahead. But marriage isn't on the top of my list right now, and I guarantee that it won't be anytime soon.
Putting my needs and wants first is sort of a foreign concept to me. I am used to putting everyone before me, as I am the kind of person who wants to make others happy before making myself happy. Realizing that I have to make myself happy before I can truly make anyone else happy has been a journey, and it's one that I have just started.
Throughout my relationship, I always put my boyfriend first. And to an extent, that is okay. But I never found the line of when it was too far, and ended up hurting myself and stretching myself too thin.
I'm here to tell you that there is NOTHING wrong with putting your needs in front of someone else. Your happiness and well being should be your number one priority regardless of your relationship status. Of course you need to be there for your partner, but there comes a time where if you aren't making your needs a priority, they won't ever be one.
Putting yourself first after not doing so for so long is difficult. It's new and can feel like you are being selfish. In reality, there isn't anything wrong with prioritizing and living life for yourself. As long as you are doing and pursuing what makes you happy, that should be the only thing that matters.
