Aside from just being your average, everyday black woman, I feel like I was always the only student of minority in my classes growing up. All of my education experiences have been the same considering I only went to two different schools prior to college, and at both, I was probably one of about seven or less black kids in my entire school.

It never bothered me, it wasn’t like I thought it was weird or anything. Well, until I found myself constantly stuck in the same sort of situation that was just plain awkward. Now, in school it’s normal to study different monumental parts of history—the Holocaust, slavery and maybe even Japanese internment camps depending on how diverse the curriculum wanted to be. In retrospect, I’m sure it would have been more awkward back then if my grade school teachers were asking me to comment on what I thought about slavery and how much I knew about it, and then opening up the discussion to how all of my non-black classmates felt about it. But it wasn’t until now that I realized being the only black kid in your class while talking about social issues regarding your race is probably the most uncomfortably infuriating situation one could ever be in.

I’m in a class now where we talk about how independent media has helped right wrongs and prove injustices in a number of ways. We watch a lot of videos showing police brutality and things like that, but it's not until the comments start flowing that my brain starts going, “What the actual f*ck.” I find myself in a place of static and I’m not sure what my next move should be. People just say some wild things and I get stuck in the middle. Do I revert to being “that black girl” who is extra defensive and comes at everyone for no reason, do I clap back, do I just let it happen? Here's my problem.

So I just chill, and I slowly raise my hand when something gets really out of pocket. But then it's like the teacher knows what student X said was out of pocket, see’s me (the black girl) raising her hand and springs to student X’s defense by trying to reiterate his or her thought and make it sound better. And then the conversation ends there. Super frustrating, am I right?

Aside from my class perspective, I also am one of the only black women in my friend group of mixed political views and opinions. I have to say that my favorite thing is when my friends try to reassure me that I’ll be OK. Mainly by telling me I act so white that—you know—it’s a saving grace. Because the cop knows my personality right? Oh of course. True.

I love them, and I love that they’re only trying to help. But at the end of the day, I just have one request for everyone. Please, stop trying to empathize, because you know what? You can’t. I appreciate it, I really do but it’s actually impossible.

So to my minority men and women, I’m here with you. I feel your blood boiling with every unintentionally ignorant comment spewed by someone you don’t even know. I feel you when you don’t know how to react. And I understand that being in this situation at this time can be a bit daunting. But I also know one other thing: it’ll be ok.