We've all struggled with insecurities and with self-consciousness at some point in our lives. I have definitely had this issue. Growing up, I was bullied. This went on from elementary school up until high school. I've been told things like, "You have a weight problem," or "you're chubby." I've also received mean remarks about my personality most of my life. For a long time, I let all of these "labels" define who I am. I let everyone around me tell me who I am or who I'm supposed to be. It's been a problem up until recently. I found my worth, and now I want to show you yours.
I learned that, over the years of being made fun of or being talked about, nobody can be me. Nobody can fulfill the purpose that God has called me to fulfill except for me. Someone else's definition of me is not who I am. That was the first thing that I had to learn. It was tough to process, because my brain tells me, "But so many people think or have said this...." but it literally means nothing. Yes it hurts, but it means nothing to who you are.
The second thing that I had to learn was that I am beautifully made, and I don't need that approval from others. I've lived alone for most of this summer, and that was the biggest lesson I learned. Being alone means making decisions without having to ask for someone else's opinion. Just in case you didn't know, your opinion matters just as much as anyone else's. This summer, I learned to love myself. I had to! I spent so much time by myself, that I couldn't spend another second hating who God made me! I learned that I am beautiful without having the reassurance from others. Why would I need someone else's permission to be myself?
The last thing I learned was that I am worthy of unconditional love. I don't know if you've ever watched or read "The Perks of Being a Wallflower," but a quote from that book is, "We accept the love we think we deserve." That is one of the truest quotes. That is why we need to understand that we don't deserve half-assed love. (Excuse my language.) We are not worthless. Listen to me, you do not deserve any of the hate you've received. Do you want to know why? It's because you're a child of God. You are a beautiful creation, even if sometimes, it doesn't feel like it.
For most of my life, I never felt beautiful. I didn't feel beautiful until I understood God's love for me. I mess up every single day. I make bad decisions, I am far from perfect, and throughout my life, I was convinced that those things discredited my worth. But guess what! Your worth is not affected by anything you do, because you can't earn worth. You can't earn love. You can't earn beauty. But I can tell you, you are worthy. You are loved. You are beautiful.
