To Women Who Have Been the Victims of Sexism,
No, you did not deserve to be harassed by that person incessantly. No, you did absolutely nothing to be put into that torturous situation. Please, cope in healthy ways; see a professional health specialist or anyone else in your life you know and trust, write about it, anything that will help you move forward. But whatever you do, please do not blame yourself. Nothing you could have done made you deserve to have your privacy and your wellbeing completely violated and taken away temporarily. You are better than what that person did to you, and you are going to rise above them and be the strongest you have ever been because of that person's mistakes. That is the best revenge and the best thing you can do for yourself. Opening up about a traumatic situation such as harassment or assault is difficult beyond words, and it will be so troublesome at times, but it is the first step in continuing the rest of your life. Please, please know that you will never be alone. You have people that care for you, and people that you have not met yet that are going to want to help you continue the rest of your life in peace. There is a light and you will enter it in your future, so please never forget that.
No, you did not deserve to be catcalled while walking down a sidewalk. Your outfit was not "too revealing", you were not "asking for it" in any way, and this person's lack of decency and intelligence does not at all reflect who you are as a person. Don't let this person question your worth, don't let this person question what you choose to wear the next time you go out in public, and don't let this person make you bitter. It is not too much to ask for a human being to coexist with other human beings and be able to be out in public without being somehow violated; you are absolutely not exception to this. Please remember that the person who has done this to you is truly not educated enough on how damaging this can be to someone's psyche, as well as the fact as he does not own you, and you are not there for his entertainment. Educate your friends and your family, men and women alike, on just how horrible this is and how no one deserves to be called out and humiliated in such a way. Honestly, the ultimate way to stand up to the toxic societal stigma of catcalling and to have it cease to exist is educating others on its effects.
No, you did not deserve to be abused in that relationship. He or she did not have the right to control your every move or make you so miserable to the point where you felt as though you could not recover. His/her own jealousy and his/her own insecurities are problems that he/she must handle in a mature manner, and he/she should have not put you in that crossfire. If he/she cared for you and loved you the way you deserved to be loved and cared for, then he/she would have known that; I promise. Recovering from an abusive relationship is a long and winding road, but please try not to go back to what made you unhappy in the first place. It is difficult, but one must move forward. You are too strong to look back and waste your valuable time on someone who did not know what to do with it in the first place. You deserve the most love and care. You should be put on your own pedestal, and only the most worthy can reach it. Continue your life strengthening current healthy relationships in your life, and do positive things for yourself at least once a day. Leading your life after letting someone go who you cared about is not an easy path, but if this person felt as though they could control you and make you into someone you're not for your own convenience, then it is most certainly time to do what is best for you.
To all women who have been treated less than they deserve to be treated, all at the hands of someone who mistakenly thought that they could be controlled for his/her own satisfaction; I am with you. I side with you, I relate to you, and I am there for you. Keep your head high and above those who try to look down on you. They won't succeed.
