As cliché as it might sound, you walked into my life unexpectedly, and it hasn’t been the same since. All the places we used to go hold a remnant of our laughter and inside jokes. Certain foods I eat taste like the nostalgia of our summer nights, coasting the interstate and listening to music I never even heard of until I found you. Some songs have lyrics that make my heart race because we used to sing them together, and now I whisper them into the atmosphere, unrealistically hoping the waves will travel to you—miles and miles away. I can recall our late night talks about everything and nothing at all, about God and the past and the happiness that seemingly awaited us in the future. We were kids then. Kids in the honeymoon phase and unaware of shambles we’d eventually end up in.
Life separated us.
It tore us apart almost as unexpectedly as it put us together. Suddenly, the future wasn’t so certain and the confidence in our love was a subject of concern. We didn’t know that God would take the pieces of this puzzle we created ourselves and rearrange them to fit His will. We were kids then. Kids who thought they knew what this “love thing” was about. The pieces of the life we’d envisioned were broken apart to produce something else when life took us to separate worlds. Two separate worlds that surrounded us with all things shiny and new—available for experimentation and open to interpretation.
From then on we would never be the same.
We knew our love was strong, but suddenly there were so many different possibilities. New opportunities to fall for the next one. A chance to rewrite our plans and hope for something even better than we had had before. The future we thought we’d always have slipped from us, and there were words forgotten. Inside jokes were buried with the lyrics of our favorite songs, and old memories were replaced with new ones. We still loved each other dearly, but we were still kids and the world seemed so big and endless. We held on to what we had left with an understanding of how we felt. In addition to that, we understood that now was the time to take our separate train routes and trust that God would put us back where we belong if we were meant to be.
However, that train never returned.
We disconnected and grew on diverse paths—different places, different times, a different pace. We came into our own, experiencing our true selves for the first time without the strict instruction of our parents. We discovered all things we’d never known and found out that the people who were brought together before no longer existed. We are no longer the same people who fell in love and created the puzzle that is now destroyed. We are no longer the ones who tried to keep it together when we felt like we were starting to lose it all. Who we were faded, and who we became enhanced. We exchanged words that we wish we never said and lost so much of the love that accumulated at the start. What we had evaporated. We are no longer in control or able to grasp the past. And although life has taught me a great deal about love, life never taught me how to fall out of love with you.
