There are many women who have significantly influenced my life, but there are two who influenced me more than the others. One of those women I have never met, the other I see everyday; neither of them have I ever thanked until now.
To the woman who gave me life:
Although I have never met you and have never spoken to you, I feel as though I know you in a sense. Since I was old enough to know what it meant to be adopted, I have only felt gratitude toward you. Many ask if I am mad that you "gave me away," but you did not do that. When you give something away you tend to forget about it, and, although I do not know for certain, I am fairly positive that you think about me often. So the answer to that question is simply "no," I am not mad.
How could I be mad at the woman who gave me life? Thank you for choosing to give me life and a future when I know there were other choices you could have made instead of the one that you did. I can only imagine how hard of a choice it was to make. You carried me with you everywhere for nine months and then were left with nothing but memories and a few pictures every year on October 1st. Thank you for teaching me to be selfless. You knew you could give me life, but not the life that was best for me. You put my needs above your wants and that is an incredible act to do.
Know that I am doing well. God has blessed me with an amazing family that loves and cares for me greatly. Faith plays a strong role in my life, and I know that everything happens for a reason. Although you were not able to care for me to the level you felt I deserved, and you were faced with the unimaginably difficult task of placing me for adoption, your selfless act has been one of my family's greatest blessings. My parents never hid where I came from or who you were. From a young age, when I was taught to say my nightly prayers, my family always included you, and as I have grown to say my own prayers you are always included.
Although I cannot say for certain if we will ever meet, I can say for certain that you have helped shape me into who I am now. Being an adoptee has taught me to believe that all things happen because God has a plan, and I have been able to face many other struggles with that mentality too. Thank you for the selfless act 21 years ago. Without you and the choice you made, I would not be here doing all the things I am doing and accomplishing.
I will continue to keep you in my daily thoughts and prayers.
To the woman who taught me to live it:
Thank you. Thank you for seeing no difference between loving a biological child and loving an adopted child. You have been there for me since the beginning, holding my hand through life's journey, and I am not sure I have ever really thanked you for doing that. I am by no means perfect, but you love me every day as though I am. Thank you for encouraging me every day to be myself and show the world the gifts I have to offer.
You never hid from me where I came from and you always are there to talk to when I have questions. I know that it cannot always be easy. You gave me 21 years of life, took me to every practice and every recital, hugged me when I was hurt, and disciplined me when needed, but there were times when I would ask about the "other" woman. I am sure there were times when you wondered why I cared to know so much about a woman who I had never met. Thank you for always answering me with a smile on your face and love in your heart. I asked those questions not to upset you, but to better understand the woman who brought me into this world.
You will forever and always be my mom, my REAL mom. I know it bothered you when kids would ask me questions about me birth mom but would refer to her as my real mom. Please know that you will always be the only one I consider mom. Although she gave me life, you were the one who taught me to live it. Through your example, I have seen who I want to be one day as a mother, as a wife, and as a friend.
Although you did not bring me into this world, I would not be able to survive this world without the love and guidance you have given me. There is so much more that I could tell you, but thankfully I get to talk to you every day, and I promise the next phone call between us I will tell you all this and more because life is too short to love those you have in your life but to not let them know.
Love you forever and always.
