Wow, do I miss You.

I miss the sound of your voice, the way that you would always joke with me like no other. More than anything I miss the precious moments that we shared. The times where you always believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself.

I know that you would have wanted me to stay positive, but it is so hard knowing that I have to be on this earth without you. Every time I was upset you knew just what to do so that I was smiling again. There has always been the question " Why do the good always die young?". Still to this day, that question hasn't been answered.

The hardest part of losing you was knowing that all the amazing and memorable times we had together came to an end. That there had to last moments for us. I'll never get to hear your voice again. I'll never get to have you as a contact in my phone. I can't just call you up in the middle of the day just to talk and know you'll listen. It is the little things that we don't notice as being so important until we don't have them anymore.

I know that if you were still here that you would be proud of me. That you would be proud of how far I have come. You always told me to go give it my all. I wish you could see all the things I have accomplished since you have been gone. You are the reason I get up every morning. The reason I am in college trying every day to make a difference. I know that I can't make you come back but, I plan to live through you and most importantly keep the memories of you alive.

Whether it is losing someone from a tragic accident, suicide or in my case cancer, the days never go by where you don't think about that person. I have learned that it is so important to cherish the little moments. You never know when you are going to wake up with the unexpected news that your loved one is gone.

Cancer took the one person that understood me and never failed to make me smile. She was the light in the room during the darkest times and the laughter you needed on the days you just felt sad. I know that I could be upset for the rest of my life. I could fall into a state where I don't want to ever look back. Yet, I chose to make the most of the time I have left on this earth. I chose to be happy for her.

I know in my heart that if you were still here you would be that person in the stands at every home game. The person who would give me that motivation even when I didn't have the best practice. Knowing all of that is is what keeps me going at the end of the day.

I don't know why you had to go so soon, or why it had to be me.

What I do know is this:

Everything happens for a reason. I have to believe that God has a plan for us all. I have to believe that there is so much more to learn from all of this.

I’m not alone. There are so many people each and every day that lose a best friend, a loved one, a brother, a sister, a mother, a father. Support those people with open arms and love. You may never know what a simple "thinking of you text" may do for a person.

Even though I lost my best friend so young, I will continue to live a life of happiness and grace. I promise to do everything in my power to be the best person I can. Thank you for being there for me when I needed you the most. The positive impact you left on this world has changed my life for the better.It is an honor to be called your daughter.

I love you so much, Momma.

Not only is this one for you, but also for all of those who have lost someone too soon.

Rest in Peace.

Laura Ann Deldin Schonhiutt

November 5th, 1963 - December 7th, 2009