At the end of next week, my family and I are moving. With that comes going through all of the junk that you have held onto for far too long. I'm not an avid journaler even though writing is one of the best ways that I have found to express my feelings. But I found a journal from February/March of last year. There were only four entries, so I thought that I would read through them to see what I was stressed out about a little over a year ago. After reading the entries, I thought it was appropriate to write a letter to myself back when I wrote in that journal.
To Megan in 2015,
You just transferred from a private university to a community college near home, and you are so concerned about making new friends. At the university you just left, you had made a lot of friends and joined a sorority that you loved dearly. Quality friendships are not built in a couple of months, but you'll make some, I promise. You'll meet someone in your chemistry class and they will quickly become one of your best friends (and they still are). You don't have to worry about not knowing anyone in your classes each semester because you'll go out of your way to make sure that you take one every semester with this person here on out.
You are frustrated with your recent diagnosis of chronic migraines and tired of being in pain constantly. I wish I could tell you that your headaches will get better, but they won't; they get worse, actually. You say that you don't have much hope left for a cure, but you must have some hope left if you are still fighting this battle to this day. Even though having a constant headache for two years is the worst thing that has happened to you in your life so far, it's brought good things too. You will learn to empathize with people in pain so much more, which will help you in the future. You will be looked up to by people who are amazed that you can go day by day in so much pain, but still keep a smile on your face. Never lose that smile that people love so much.
You are worried that you won't get into nursing school and, unfortunately, you didn't; don't lose hope, though. Don't spend your time looking into different majors even though you know deep down that you can only see yourself going into nursing. Don't let this bad news stop you from doing well in your classes and from pursuing your dream. When you finally get into nursing school, you will cry so many happy tears, which will make up for all of the sad ones that you cried the year before.
You will learn so much in a year and also face some unexpected battles, but you are more than strong enough to get through them. I can't tell you that everything gets better, but I can tell you that everything happens for a reason.
Love,
Megan in 2016
