A Letter To The Men Who Don't Realize What They Have Till It's Gone

A Letter To The Men Who Don't Realize What They Have Till It's Gone

Brittany Murdock
Brittany Murdock Nov 3, 2015
8507
views

Dear the one who let me go,

I’ve heard it all before: “I was stupid; I didn’t know what I had until it was gone; I realized I messed up.” Well, let me give you a little bit of advice -- that line is getting a tad bit too old. If you don’t remember, you let me go, and you don’t get the decision to walk back into my life whenever it’s convenient for you. It’s emotionally draining and something I just can’t do anymore. Like the caring women that we are, we believe what you say, and we try again placing our fragile hearts back in your hands only to have it destroyed all over again months down the road. We do this even when you promised things would be different this time around. I’m tired of being thought of and considered worth it only after I’m gone.

Well, to your surprise and even to my own surprise, your plea to have me back isn’t going to work. Did you experiment after we broke up and realize that some girl you met at the bar and took home is the complete opposite of me? She doesn’t care about your feelings and doesn’t go out of her way to make your day like I did? I’m tired of being the girl you realized was amazing only after I was gone.

I want a man who knows what he has when he has me, and I have no problem waiting for that man. I’m tired of not being good enough the first time around. I’m tired of people having to seek out what else they can find until returning back to me. I’m tired of being your last option when all else fails. Why does it have to take losing me to find out that you need me back?

The majority of these letters end with thanking that person who broke your heart, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do. I want to thank you for opening up my eyes to the future men who share this legendary line with me because you have saved my heart from yet another heartbreak. You have played a crucial role in my future and when the next guy gives me that legendary line, I’ll be sure to point them in your direction so you can explain to them why you’ve left me with nothing but lack of emotion. It’s a trend with you men and when the next guy says it, I’ll be sure to not believe him and walk away with nothing but pride because I have learned from the very best.

Sincerely,

The girl who was enough the first time around

Cover Image Credit: The Cosmic Dolphin
Brittany Murdock
Brittany Murdock Nov 3, 2015
At University of North Carolina at Wilmington

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To The Girl Who Isn't Graduating On Time, It Won't Feel Any Less Amazing When You Do

Graduating is something to be proud of no matter how long it takes you.

Miranda Myers
Miranda Myers May 8, 2019
20639
views

To the girl who isn't graduating college "on time,"

I promise, you will get there eventually, and you will walk across that graduation stage with the biggest smile on your face.

You may have a different journey than the people you grew up with, and that is OKAY. You may have some twists and turns along the way, a few too many major changes, a life change, you may have taken most of a semester off to try to figure your life out, and you're doing the best you can.

Your family and your friends don't think less of you or your accomplishments, they are proud of your determination to get your degree.

They are proud of the woman you are becoming. They don't think of you as a failure or as someone any less awesome than you are. You're getting your degree, you're making moves towards your dreams and the life that you have always wanted, so please stop beating yourself up while you see people graduating college on time and getting a job or buying a car.

Your time will come, you just keep doing what you need to do in order to get on that graduation stage.

Your path is set out for you, and you will get there with time but also with patience. The place you're at right now is where you are supposed to be. You are going to thrive and you are going to be the best version of you when you graduate and start looking for a company that you will be proud to work for. Don't look on social media and feel less than, because at least you're still working towards your degree that you are finally passionate about. You will be prepared. You will be ready once the time comes and you cross the stage, move away, and start your journey in whatever field you're going into.

Don't question yourself, and be confident in your abilities.

With love,

A girl who isn't graduating on time

Miranda Myers
Miranda Myers May 8, 2019
At University of Oklahoma

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I'm Not The Person I Was In High School And I'm Not Sorry I Changed

I'm sorry, the old me can't come to the phone right now.

graciedough
graciedough May 19, 2019
163
views

If those who knew me in high school hung out with me now, they probably wouldn't recognize me. If my friends from college hung out with me around two years ago, they probably wouldn't recognize me. It's safe to say I've changed... a lot. I definitely find the change to be for the better and I couldn't be happier with the person I've become.

In high school, I would sit at home every night anxiously waiting to leave and go out. Now, honestly, going out is the last thing I want to do any night of the week. While everyone in college is at a fraternity party or at the bars, I prefer to sit at home on the couch, watching Netflix with my boyfriend. That's an ideal night for me and it is exactly the opposite of what I wanted to do a couple of years ago. There's nothing wrong with going out and partying, it's just not what I want to do anymore.

I craved attention in high school. I went to the parties and outings so I could be in Snapchats and photos, just so people would know I was there. I hung out with certain groups of people just so I could say I was "friends" with so-and-so who was so very popular. I wanted to be known and I wanted to be cool.

Now, I couldn't care less. I go to the bars or the parties if I really feel like it or if my friends make me feel bad enough for never going anywhere that I finally decide to show up. It's just not my scene anymore and I no longer worry about missing out.

If you could look back at me during my junior year of high school, you probably would've found me searching for the best-ranked party schools and colleges with the best nearby clubs or bars. Now, you can find me eating snacks on the couch on a Friday night watching the parties through other peoples' Snapchats.

Some may say that I'm boring now, and while I agree that my life is a little less adventurous now than it was in high school, I don't regret the lifestyle changes I've made. I feel happier, I feel like a better person, I feel much more complete. I'm not sorry that I've changed since high school and I'm not sorry that I'm not living the typical "college lifestyle." I don't see anything wrong with that life, it's just not what makes me happy and it's not what I want to do anymore.

I've become a different person since high school and I couldn't be happier about it. I have a lot that's contributed to the change, but my boyfriend definitely was the main factor as he showed me that staying in can be a million times better than a night out. My interests and my social cravings have completely transitioned into that of an 80-year-old grandma, but I don't regret it.

Change doesn't have to be a bad thing. In fact, it can bring a lot more happiness and comfort. The transition from high school to college is drastic, but you can also use it as an opportunity to transition from one lifestyle to another. I don't regret the lifestyle flip I made and I couldn't be less apologetic about it.

graciedough
graciedough May 19, 2019
At Florida Gulf Coast University

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