Dear Extroverts,
I wish I could be as open as you, wanting to stay where people could see me whenever, and that I would never get tired of talking. However, that's just not how I work. I have to have some space, but I'm never trying to be rude or disrespectful.
I may not always speak when I see you, but it's not because I don't like you. It's because I feel that I do not have enough energy to carry out a conversation, natural or forced. I also may not speak if I do not know how you feel about me. I know this sounds ridiculous to you because if I don't speak, then it leaves a worse impression than if I do speak, but that's just how I work.
After my classes or after work, I sneak into my room and I don't want to talk to anyone. This is the time for me to recharge and to gather my thoughts for the day. Without this time, I will become very irritable and will not socialize well. I need some time to myself to watch TV, read a book, write or to just daydream. It's like my 'nap' for the day.
I am not good at meeting people, even though I only want to gain new friends and get my name out there. I am, once again, worried of what people may think of me and am worried that I won't be accepted. If I could, then I would join every single thing I could to meet people, but I have found it easier for me to stay in my bubble so that I am not over-committed, and thus, still get my alone time. You see, the thing about introverts is that we feel like we have to fit in perfectly. Our nature is not to go out and meet people, thus, when we are forced in a situation like this, we are often drained. We want to be open with new people and talk their ear off. However, it is exhausting and places pressure on us.
If you talk to me,then I am always going to talk back. I love people and I want to be around them. I love being with my friends and I hate being alone, unless I'm recharging. I have to have time for my creative pursuits, however, and that to me is focusing my time on writing or creating art in some form.
I am not shy. In fact, once you realize who I am, you will realize that I am an open book and don't have any secrets. Another thing you will realize is that I am always there for you. I am trustworthy and am always willing to lend a helping hand.
I'm not being quiet because I don't know how to talk to people or because I am uninterested. I keep to myself because social encounters can be draining. Unlike some of you, I am not recharged by spending time with people. I need my time, otherwise, I literally cannot function.
I don't follow what everyone is doing not because I don't agree, but because of the simple fact that I do not conform. I always go my own way and have never followed the crowd. Therefore, if I do not want to do something, then you can bet that I will not show my face.
I hate if I have ever given the impression of being rude; I am the farthest thing from it and love to be with others. However, I need time to myself where I can just be me, by myself. This is the only way I can be perfectly content with myself. It's just the way I am. I apologize if I have ever given anyone the impression of being avoidant, just know that this is something that helps me gain energy to face the rest of the day.
Sincerely,
An Introvert
