To my ex that broke me,

Like all relationships, we started off great. But unlike most, you broke me. There isn't a minute that goes by that a memory pops into my head.

You were my everything. You were my best friend, boyfriend and family. But you took that all away because of another girl.

It scares me to think I was not good enough for you. And it makes me question if I am good enough for anyone now.

You made my depression so much harder to deal with. I question every move I make with a guy, because I am worried I will screw everything up. I know I am not the only girl that does this.

I know I am not the only girl that is scared to be close to someone again. I know I am not the only girl who is scared to trust someone again. I know I am not the only girl who is scared to share all of her inner thoughts with someone again.

But I do have to admit, you taught me some things as well. You taught me to never rely on just one person for everything. Because after you left, I did not have anyone there for me. I broke all my connections so I could be totally committed to you.

You taught me to never think ahead for my future with a guy. I only think of the present now. It's because we planned our whole lives out. We planned to get married, have children, and have the big house with two dogs.

But the most important thing you taught me was that I have to love myself before I can love anyone else. It's been a rough journey, but I have to be comfortable with my own skin. I have to find a way to like myself and not have self-hatred.

Even though there are sometimes that I wish I had never met you, it is the times like these when I reflect on the past that I am happy that I did. If I had not met you, I wouldn't be the strong girl I am today.

But this does not mean that I don't still love you, because I do. I think like all girls, that is what I hate most.

"But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all," - 10 Things I Hate About You