I remember coming home. I remember coming home crying- coming home crying and yelling to my mother, “Why can't I find a friend that is afraid to lose me, why cant I find a friend that understands and sees the person I am?” I remember how foggy it all seemed, knowing that these temporary people wouldn’t be time capsules for my memories. I remember wanting to move on from all of the short term personalities and fake laughs as if Alissa Cara's “Here” was playing on a loop in my head; constantly wanting to feel what it was like to be 100 percent authentic with someone. Finally, I remember feeling tired, feeling hopeless, and feeling as though what I was looking for was simply a pipe dream, as though who I am would never break the surface- thoughts would never be shared or advocated for.
Finding you was a long process with zero paperwork. It was being stuck in the waiting room of life for 17 years without being called. It was aggravating and, needless to say, I had lost hope. Until one day it wasn’t. The day finding you, turned into found you is the day my life turned around. It was like a greater power knew how cool and obnoxious we'd be together, and how much the world needed a little bit of our zest. From the moment we met, we knew this power wouldn’t let us be apart.
After 17 years of dragging feet, it was back to back episodes of life tugging me to the surface for air. It was fast, and it was the reason I am now that happiest I've ever been. They say we all have a soulmate, and it isn’t necessarily the person you choose to marry or the ones you fall in love with. It's just the person who shares your heart. That person is You, and I am so grateful that I found you, because finding you was like “putting on glasses for the first time”, it was like finding “my person”, and it was realizing how lucky I am to be alive and living on the same planet as someone who has this genuine and kind heart.
So to sum it up, the day I found you was the day I started to find myself. I'll only be able to ever thank you for being my ray of sunshine, for being the one I'll come to in the upcoming years for marriage advice, or child tips (because we both know you'll be the better parent). Finally, thank you for allowing me to finally be able to share who I am with the world, and assuring me that they're crazy if they don’t love us back.
