I wanted to start by thanking you for the amount of patience you must have in order to marry me. I will admit that I am a handful with a lot of dreams and little room for compromise. I know that my dreams for the future must be both beautiful and terrifying for those who are not in my head and are unable to see exactly what it is I do.

In all honesty, I want to commend you for being able to rope me in and keep me for yourself long enough to put a rock on my finger. You see, when a child is taught by a strong mother to be equally strong and a hard-working father to never give up on what they are chasing, you end up with a person who has a lot of independence, and not a lot of sense to stop and enjoy what is happening in the moment.

I will admit to not always seeing what is right in front of me. I blame this entirely on how exciting the future is, with all the things I would like to see and the experiences I would like to experience just out of my reach. I would like to apologize for all of the times my reaching for these may push you away, and hope that in these moments you hold me closer to your heart.

I also would like to apologize for all the times that I may question us. Although my dreams may be looking towards the future, my heart will always bring up the past. I am sorry that a boy that you have never met will have such an impact on how I love. All the times I ask you “Are you sure?”, as well as my initial reluctance to open myself up enough to simply state “I love you” are not because of you. I promise that everyday I am working hard to overcome those feelings of insignificance, and that regardless of them, I will still love you.

I may not show my love for you all of the time, as my mind tends to lead me off on adventures without a moment’s notice. I may push you away. I may test your patience. Just know that in those moments of self-doubt, while I put myself down and question your sanity in being with me, I do love you.

I apologize for the attitude I may give you, and for my wish to have things done in a very particular way. I am sorry for how exhausting it may be when I get upset over the smallest things that are honestly not worth getting myself worked up over. Thank you for acknowledging my passion, and for your ability to stop me in my tracks with that “are you serious right now?” look that you probably have way too much practice giving

I cannot promise that our life together will be perfect. After all, I am far from perfect. I am still trying to learn how to love myself and allow my heart to run free again. All I ask is that you be patient with me, and show me that you love me. I am good at running, and am sorry if I ever try to push you away. Please never let us go to bed angry, regardless of how tired we both are. Own up to your mistakes, as I will own up to mine. Do not forget the beginning, and why it is that we chose one another.

I can promise you that regardless of my fears, self-doubt, attitude, and stubbornness, that I have searched for you and will fight to hold onto you for the rest of my life. Because I love you.