You aren't alone.
I know that high school is rough, especially when at all times you have someone trying to tear you down and make you feel like you aren't good enough. You just want the gossip to stop and you just want to find friends that will be there for you no matter what the situation. I can't tell you that gossip will stop, I wish I could. But trust me, it does get a little better. One day you will grow up and figure out who your best friends are. You will begin to understand that it's not about showing off that you have a whole bunch of friends, it's about having a few close friends who will always have your back. Soon you will find the most amazing friends you have ever met in your life. I can promise you, these girls are going to be your bridesmaids. They will always be there for you when you need them most. To come into your room on a Friday night when your feeling sad and give you the best girls night you can imagine. It's those few friends that make you realize how lucky you truly are.
Right now, it probably seems like it is the end of the world that a boy doesn't reciprocate your feelings. You might find yourself crying in your bed, just wondering why love is so difficult to understand. But believe me, you'll find Mr. Right. He's not the person you saw yourself with at first, but trust me: he's everything you will ever need. He understands that you have trouble opening up and that you will never fully stop being so self-conscious. He understands you in ways that you never thought was possible. But he makes sure to make you feel that you are the most beautiful girl in the world. He shows you that there is more to the world than the superficial life that surrounds us. But don't be afraid to show him who you are. Don't run away from the love that he is willing to give you, because I can promise you, he will never let anything happen to you. He will spend his life making sure that nothing ever hurts you again the way you have been hurt before.
Body image is hard. You just want to look like the girls you see in the magazines and the celebrities you see on television. Believe me, I understand. But those girls aren't real. You are beautiful no matter what your weight is and I can't express enough that it doesn't matter how you look on the outside. It's the person you are on the inside that counts and I can promise you that when you get older, that is more than enough.
I know that this probably doesn't mean much to you right now. I know that you probably don't want anyone to help you. You want to show that you are able to pick yourself up without anyone else's help. I know you. But I would have given anything to have someone tell me that everything was going to be okay.
