Your Mom and Dad raised you right. You're always the one to make a good first impression and you're always polite and respectful. You're the nice girl. Some characteristics about your stand out among the rest. People always describe you as being so sweet and friendly. And it’s true! You always put others before yourself, you make sure the whole group is having a good time, you surprise your friends on your birthday, you pay for the appetizer or the uber fare when no one else steps up to the plate, you pick up shifts at work, and you hardly ever say no when a favor is asked of you.
You would consider yourself a nice person for doing all these things, right? Shouldn't we have more nice girls like you in the world? The answer is no.
But why? Why shouldn't you be pleasant and likable at all times? Well the truth of the matter is that not everyone is like you. There are people that are quite the opposite and would never think to do the things that you do on a regular basis. Whether it's something as simple as letting a car pull out in front of you during rush hour or doing random acts of kindness for a friend or stranger, there are so many people who think of themselves more than others (unlike you). Now sure, not everyone is in the world is completely arrogant, and not everyone shows their thoughtfulness the way you normally do. Everyone shows their empathy for others in different ways.
But unlike everyone else, you are too empathetic. You let people walk all over all the time you but you're too nice to do anything about it. You never want to say no when someone asks you to do something or help them out because you’d feel bad. You go out of your way too often for people who do so little for you. I know this because I do the same thing.
At the end of the day these sort of things only stress you out. In reality, you need to take a step back and think “if I can’t take time to help myself, how do I have time to help others?” This doesn't mean you should become a self centered or a total b***h, but there is a difference between giving up on something and knowing when you’ve had enough. We are often so caught up in trying to please other people that we often forget to make something of ourselves.
Don’t let people take advantage of your kindness; use it in the way that benefits not only the others around you, but also you. Stand up for yourself and don’t be afraid to say no. I guarantee you will feel much better taking the time to do something good for yourself rather than spending your time overdoing it. If you have sympathy for others, be the nice girl that you are and have some for yourself, too.
