To My Boyfriend, Thanks For Riding The Rollercoaster Of Our Relationship With Me For The Past 3 Years

To My Boyfriend, Thanks For Riding The Rollercoaster Of Our Relationship With Me For The Past 3 Years

Dear Jesse, I love you.
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Some people don't believe in love at first sight. Others think that there is always love in the air. What did I think? Well, I didn't know what love was. In high school, I was in two relationships where I am pretty sure, looking back, I was in love with the idea of love.

Both relationships seemed like they were going to last forever, and I marveled at that fact. However, of course, they didn't last forever. But, I'm glad they didn't. You know why? Because now I am with the guy that I know for a fact I love.

I finally realized what love was. I remember it being a warm feeling that overtook me when he smiled at me for the first time. Now, on March 5th, we will be celebrating our 3 year anniversary and I couldn't be happier. Time to take a trip down memory lane.

I was a senior in high school, he was a junior. We went to completely different high schools but God still brought us together through working at Chuck E. Cheese. I remember the first day he started; I wasn't going to talk to him because why would I? I didn't have a reason to talk to him. . . until I found one. I needed to trade shifts with someone and he was the first person I thought of.

I walked up to him and asked if he would like to switch with me because I had a band event. He proceeded to ask me what kind of band. It didn't even occur to me that he was thinking of an actual garage band so when I said orchestral, I was a little offended when he laughed at me. However, he said he would "think about it" and he asked for my number so he could let me know.

Little did I know, that me giving him my number was all a ploy just so he could have it. That was his "smooth" way of getting my number and looking back, I think that was the most genius way to get a girl's number. Kudos to you babe. That was the day it started.

We hung out with each other for a while after that and it wasn't until two months later that we went on an actual date and it was honestly one of the best nights I have ever had. A month after that, he officially asked me to be his girlfriend and we have been together ever since.

Fast forwarding to present time: We now live together in a studio here in Phoenix and I attend college while he works full time. I couldn't think of a better life. So what, if we are living together before we are even married? I think it is better this way so you can get to know the person better.

With our 3 year anniversary here, I just wanted to let everyone know how much I love and appreciate this boy, so here it goes. Here comes the heartwarming open letter.

Dear Jesse,

These past three years with you have been the best of my life. You have opened my life to a whole new perspective that I didn't even think about living before. You have taken me on so many crazy adventures, opened my ears to new genres of music, and allowed me to blossom into the person I was meant to be.

I am glad God brought you into my life because now that I have you, I don't know what I would have been doing with my life without you. You have given me so many memories that I will never forget and I look forward to the many more memories I know we will make together.

We have been on such a rollercoaster ride together, especially with our relationship being long distance for two years, but I am so glad that we rode it together and got through it. I'm glad you found me. I'm glad that you are the one I get to argue/debate about superheroes with, go to festivals and concerts with, and ultimately get to go home to.

You have always been there when I needed you and you have loved me better than anyone I have ever known. For that, I thank you. I assure you that you're stuck with me forever and maybe this may be too early for some people, but I am already waiting for the day you put a ring on my finger. I love you!

Sincerely,

Samantha

Cover Image Credit: Samantha Hansen

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To The Girl Who's Still Crying Over the Guy She Never Dated

We've all been there, you never really dated but you might as well have...
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We’ve all been there. Every single one of us. Whether we want to admit it or not, we all have been where you are; so let me just say, you’re not alone. No matter if your friends are the best people in the world, I’m sure they’ve had enough of your sadness over a boy who you were never really with. But that’s what’s scary, it feels like you were together. No matter the amount of time, maybe a month, maybe a year, no matter what, you had enough time to gain feelings for another person and be vulnerable; and that in itself is a tough pill to swallow. Now, the one person you thought would never hurt you, did just what they promised they wouldn’t do, and now you’re left putting the pieces of your life back together.

Enough of the sappy stuff. Let me tell you that life goes on. Whether over a boy, or a grade, or whatever it is, I have always told my friends, “You’re going to make it to tomorrow.” And although it seems like the hardest feat you’ve ever endured, you are going to make it to tomorrow. And then, you’re going to make it to the next day. So it may seem that the day you end things with the boy you thought you were going to be with, is the worst day in the world, you are going to make it to tomorrow.

But even though you are going to make it to tomorrow, that doesn’t mean the situation doesn’t suck. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t cry. It doesn’t mean that you won’t be afraid or feel weird going to the bar you once loved, or the restaurant you guys would go to a lot, or the most common place to study on campus, in fear of seeing him. All of those feelings of uncertainty are totally normal, and in time, it will fade.

My friend once told me, this too shall pass.

So while you’re sad, or crying, or complaining about this boy, your friends might be telling you, “Get over it, you were never really together.” But I promise, it may take a while (seemingly forever), and as hard as it may be to believe right now, you will make it to tomorrow, and this too shall pass. Remember that.

With love from,

The girl who knows what it's like to have to get over the boy she never dated

Cover Image Credit: onehdwallpaper

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When Everyone Around You Is In a Relationship And You're Still Single

You might feel pressure to start a relationship, but reconsider...

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I'm not sure how or when exactly it happened, but it suddenly seems like everyone I know is in a relationship. While I'm happy for them, it can be kinda...depressing. Nauseating. Exhausting.

It builds slowly at first: the subtle side-eye you give your friend as they're on the phone with their S.O., the little pang of jealousy you get when your cousin posts their engagement pictures on Facebook, the way you feel when your Snapchat Stories are full of people on cute dinner dates.

Suddenly, it's a Thursday afternoon and you just snapped over an Instagram post of your friend and his boyfriend on their anniversary. We've all been there. I may or may not be there currently.

The worst advice you can get when you're feeling down about not having an S.O. is "Don't worry! You'll find someone!"(Especially when it's coming from someone in a happy relationship).

I'm here to give you the actual advice that you (and I) need to hear. You do not need a relationship to be happy, satisfied, or whole.

Here's the truth: you're gonna be just fine without a relationship. You are young. You are educated. You are ambitious and have your whole future ahead of you.

You are a complete person on your own who does not need another person to validate you or make your life worth enjoying. I'm not saying a relationship can't be satisfying and fun. I am saying that being in a relationship is not the end all, be all of happiness.

If you are spending your time waiting for a relationship and looking for it in every person you meet, you can end up missing out on so much of your life. Instead of being jealous of every couple around you and being bitter that you can't seem to find the "right person," try figuring out how to enjoy spending time as an individual.

You will have more time to devote to exploring new interests, developing new skills, and meeting new people. Your social, emotional, and mental wellbeing will become priorities.

Plus, just because you aren't in a relationship or looking for a relationship, that doesn't mean you won't have romantic/sexual experiences. You can still go on dates and develop relationships with people you are attracted to without the pressure to turn it into a serious relationship. Once you remove that expectation from your mind, you might even find it easier to meet, talk to, and connect with people.

When you stop focusing all your energy and hopes onto being in a romantic relationship, you open the door to new experiences, opportunities, and people. Most importantly, you are able to refocus and recenter your life around growth as an individual, which will lead to a healthier and more solid basis for any future relationships.

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