The “hook-up” culture is a nationwide phenomena on America’s collegiate campuses. The “hook-up” culture is a relatively self-defined ideal of sexuality and has a large range of possible meanings and interpretations!
Welcome to part one of the 10-part series on Millennial relationships from the perspective of a 21st century Catholic! In this article we are going to examine the daily reality of the hook-up culture and how the average college student experiences the hook-up culture. The second part of the series will examine how the hook-up culture aligns with Catholic values. This article is going to break down how the hook-up culture can permeate the life of college students beyond the usual limitations of an isolated weekend night.
An Undefined Physical Reality
A hook-up does not equal SEX, I repeat a hook-up does not equal SEX! I know this idea may seem foreign to some people, but a hook-up has a different definition depending on each and every individual. This means that hook-ups can have a very wide range of potential forms and types of experiences. The physical aspect of the hook-up culture can be any sensual interaction ranging from light groping to sexual intercourse.
The important part of the hook-up that does not change is the feelings and emotions of intimacy that it creates in the parties that participate in the hook-up. A hook-up as a form of sensual contact is not just a physical interaction but is an action that creates a strong emotional and spiritual bond between two individuals. This bond that is formed is one of the strongest attachments that human beings are able to form between themselves and another person. While the physical nature of a hook-up can be different for each person, the strong emotional and spiritual binds that a sensual act forms between individuals is an undeniable fact. Many Millennials try and deny this type of bond when they have hook-ups, however they somehow experiencing the side effects of intense emotional bonding in their everyday lives.
Everyday Awkwardness
Ok so let's be honest, running into the girl/guy you had a hook-up with last Friday or even a month ago can be super awkward. It fundamentally is an awkward situation when you run into the girl you made out with the night before in the omelet line at Sunday morning brunch. Especially, if you don't remember her name or can't really think of anything to say besides, "hey you're a great kisser!"
Forget the above described level of awkwardness regarding a one night stand kinda hook-up, imagine the awkwardness a long term hook-up can cause. Many people in long term hook-ups try and preserve some form of anonymity in the way they approach each other on campus or around mutual friends. It can be really important in what are these essentially secret relationships for both parties to feel like they maintain a strong sense of protection through secrecy. Imagine the kind of undue stress and anxiety that this type of avoidance and secret keeping causes upon people in long term hook-ups.
Really hook-ups can put a major monkey wrench in everyday life. Many of us never think about this reality of the hook-up culture as putting undue pressure on us outside of friday or saturday night, but the potential to challenge the sanity and mental health of any would be Casanova is definitely a reality.
