When I accepted a job offer as a paraprofessional in an elementary school summer care program, I imagined days on the playground, keeping kids from pummeling each other and trying to squeeze as much disguised lesson plans as possible into their mushy summer brains. I assumed I would be the one doing the teaching. Never did I think that I would walk away from the summer with anything other than more experience working with kids.
As it turns out, kids can teach us a lot about life, and we should start to listen to their sometimes rambling, jumbled sentences. I learned in my 10 shorts weeks playing therapist to a gaggle of kindergarten to second graders that life isn’t as complicated as we make it, and these kids have some good advice. In between the endless bathroom breaks, Band-Aid applications, wiped tears and bear hugs, these kids, wise beyond their years, taught me countless life lessons that I have forgotten about as I have grown more “mature.” I could fill a thousand pages with lessons that their naivety has allowed them to hold onto, but three have stuck with me and, I imagine, will stick with me forever.
1. We can (and should be) our own best friend.
I can’t tell you the number of times I saw a child playing by themselves and I, as someone who needs constant social interaction to feel human, immediately assume there is a problem. Ninety-nine percent of the time when I sought out the “problem” and asked why they were not around their peers, the explanation was simple: "I’m having more fun by myself." As adults, we have been conditioned to believe that the only way to enjoy ourselves is to be surrounded by others we may or may not even like. We have been taught that putting ourselves in situations with many other people will make us feel that we are having more fun. Social media hasn’t helped with this unhealthy trend; we are constantly on a mission to look like we’re having a better time than everyone else as proven by our latest Instagram picture. This summer, kids have proven to me that sometimes hanging out with only yourself is the most rewarding situation to be in. Don’t like the plans your friends have tonight? OK, then don’t go. Everyone getting on your last nerve? Stay in and have a solo movie night. There are so many reasons why we shouldn’t feel obligated to continually be in an environment of constant stimulation when, quite frankly, we could be have the same amount of (if not more) fun on our own. Let's stop feeling too insecure to take claim of the fact that we can be, and are, our own best friends, and will be the most loyal friend we will ever find.
2. Our mistakes are beautiful.
As a perfectionist, this one was a little bit harder for me to accept, but after hours of watching kids completely, in my opinion, screw up an art project but still hold it up with pride and grace, I have finally come to terms with the idea that our mistakes make us who we are. My favorite experience was when a kindergarten girl was doing nothing more than scribbling wildly on a blank sheet of paper, then she proudly held it into the air in front of the entire class and declared, “I am the best colorer in the world! I made a beautiful painting!” Her peers responded by concurring and telling her that, indeed, her drawing was phenomenal. Now to me, her sheet of paper only looked like a slop of random marks and colors, but in her eyes, because these mistakes were made by her own hand, they were exactly as they should be. We should embrace these mistakes and all of their glory. Not once did I witness a child color outside the lines and get upset about it. Rather, they shrugged their shoulders and admitted that they aren’t very good at staying in the lines and continue to color happily. Why can’t we act like this? Simply accepting that not everything we do will be perfect, and then move on with our lives. Our flaws and imperfections define our very being. Embracing these features will only make us better at being us. I can’t say that I am an expert at this quite yet; I still struggle with letting go of my perfectionist attitude and letting things be as they are. But I can safely say that I believe we would all be a little more content and satisfied with life if we just took a step back and appreciated ourselves and all the beautiful mistakes we have ever made. After all, who would we be if every decision we made were a right one?
3. Attitude is everything.
Sometimes we get crabby, and the same can be said for kids. But the difference between a child being crabby and an adult being crabby is the turnaround rate. When a child is irritable, its fairly simple to distract them with a favorite activity or a silly joke while an adult can (and probably will) be in a slump for hours or even days, sometimes simply because of stubbornness. Working with kids this summer has taught me that it can be easy to change your attitude, even in a crummy situation, and life is a lot sweeter when you quite literally turn that frown upside down. One of my favorite lines from the entire summer from a first grader was, “Why would I be sad and grumpy when I can be happy?” Please don’t ever change, kid. The world needs more people like you.
We are all guilty of mindlessly listening to kids babble without actually registering what they are saying, but we could all learn how to live life in a more positive, innocent way if we just stopped to appreciate the wisdom that is being carried in their little bodies. Take a second to listen because you might be amazed at what you are going to hear.
