Last week, my students & I read a short story in which loyalty was thematic. In anticipation of the read, I posed the question: Isn't it inevitable that some friends will grow apart? Not only did they disagree, but they did so passionately. One of them stating, "If you grow apart, then it was never even real to begin with". This is where I disagreed. However, as I tried explaining to my group of 7th graders that some relationships naturally fade, I revisited a realization I had years ago. That is: many people, adults included, fail to understand that all relationships aren't meant to last.
Admittedly, I can understand why people struggle with this idea. It's hard to accept that, after putting so much energy into a relationship, it may not be forever. But it happens. People grow. People change. Likewise, estrangement is possible when two people are moving in two different directions. Whether that be physically (long distance), or mentally (maturity and ideology), a shift will occur. Shifting apart doesn't necessarily mean your relationship wasn't genuine; it just means your relationship has served its purpose.
"Everything has its season". As Biblical as this saying is, we ignore all signs of it being valid. This is because longevity & loyalty, take precedence. We may see that growing differences are causing friction, but we choose to look the other way. Ironically, this is what makes the closing of most relationships ill-natured. We ignore and ignore until we start to internalize, taking our differences personally. In result, what is supposed to be an amicable separation, is instead, a messy divorce.
