Growing up with older brothers was not always a walk in the park. Sure, you’re technically a girl, are much smaller than them and are naturally weaker than them, but guess what? Those excuses don’t cut it in the game of life, especially when your only credentials are “younger sister.”

1. Nothing you desire in life is going to come easy.

No matter how many times your parents say to “be gentle” and “just let her play with your toy for a few minutes,” without fail, the second they leave the room it’s a dog-eat-dog world. Do you want that truck that makes the super cool noises? Oh, your brother is holding it above his head? Jump. Lesson learned.

2. Just because you fail over and over again, doesn’t mean that’s your path in life.

I swear my brothers were the most intelligent people growing up. They fixed my toys and taught me how to play with a few of their if I was lucky enough. (Like those Beyblades. I never understood how to set those up.) But when it came down to playing, it was up to me to hold my own. They gave me the lightest, weakest toy and I took it upon myself to fix it up and change out a few pieces to try and beat them. Another lesson learned. Sometimes, a few updates and substitutions will get you out on top. It just takes time.

3. It’s okay to swallow your pride and ask for advice from your elders when learning something new.

As I grew up, the lessons I learned became harder for me to accept because I was convinced I had all of the answers. When it came to sports, I didn’t want advice. I could figure it out on my own, right? Wrong. My brothers were both very good basketball and baseball players. I just so happened to play both of those sports and after getting frustrated with myself, I sought out their advice because I would watch them succeed with no effort. And that’s when it clicked. Asking for advice is a part of growing up and shows your dedication to your work. My brothers helped me realize that.

4. Never settle for less than you deserve. Everyone makes mistakes but that doesn’t mean they don’t care.

Boys. It’s a topic girls go to other girls about for advice. While that stands true, I learned so much from the way my brothers treated girls that they liked. The would bring girls to the house and I would watch as they interacted and I mentally took notes on the way they treated them with respect, naturally did caring gestures for them (ex. Holding the door) and put them before themselves. Yes, there were a few times they were not perfect, but that taught me two things. This stands true in every relationship you could have, whether professional or personal.

No matter how much I wish I had a sister to steal clothes and makeup from, I would never change my fate of growing up with older brothers. They taught, and continue to teach me lessons that I will forever hold near and dear to my heart. I would not be the mentally and physically strong girl I am today if it were not for them making me hold my own in the 19 years I’ve known them. From diapers to diplomas, they taught me to be tough and not let my “younger sister” title restrict me. And for that, I am eternally grateful.