I haven’t lived at home for more than two months at a time since just before I turned 14. So, I’ve obviously missed a lot in the lives of my siblings. And sometimes I feel really crappy about that because every time I come home I realize just how much can change in a few short months.
My little brother was only two years old when I left for boarding school, so he doesn’t really have any memories of me living in the house. Sometimes, I forget what it’s like to live in an actual house with so many people. It’s just so different from living in a dorm where everyone is the same age as me. This makes coming home kind of weird because I don’t know anyone’s routine anymore. Hell, I’m not even 100 percent sure what time they all get out of school. And as much as I love being home, something always seems a little bit off; I’m always a step behind while someone stops to explain to me what is going on that day and who needs to be where at what time.
Needless to say, I’ve missed a lot in the years I’ve been gone. Prom, graduations, award ceremonies and sports games are just the tip of the iceberg. But, I don’t ever regret leaving. The experiences that I’m having and the life that I’m living are dependent on the fact that I live clear across the country. Home is a safe haven and sometimes leaving is necessary for growth. But, I can acknowledge all of the little things that I’ve missed. Helping my brother learn how to read or my little sister gets ready for prom. Or even just helping my mom cook dinner. On the other hand, not being home for all of these things makes them a lot more special when I am here for them.
Coming home reminds me of everything I’m missing, but also all of the reasons that I left. I left to see the world and to grow as a person. I left to learn. But the great thing about being at home is that I can learn how to see the world from the perspective of an eight-year-old, or a 14-year-old athlete. So, to anyone who has any fears about leaving home or missing out on life events, don’t worry about it. Yeah, it will suck at first, but eventually, you'll realize that it was all worth it.
