Each day, I find myself scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed filled with statuses, check-ins, and photos. Just about everyone I know has a Facebook (or some form of social media) to keep in touch with friends and loved ones, and update these loved ones with what's currently going on in their lives. It's not unusual for me to scroll through Facebook a few times each day, but today was different. Today, I realized that I was staring at a bunch of unfamiliar faces and names.
Back when I first created my Facebook account early in high school, I was beyond excited to accept any and every friend request that I got. I wanted to have a large following, and in turn, I wanted to see what everyone else was up to. After all, I was seeing these people every single day during school, right? As each year passed, I found myself accepting (and sending) friend requests from incoming freshman, because we now shared the same high school. For any name I remotely recognized, I would send out a friend request. It didn’t matter if I couldn’t stand the person or knew they were far from my friend -- I still sent the request.
Fast-forward a few years, and college decisions were made. As soon as I committed to a college, I (of course) joined the Class of 2017 group page. First came the traditional posting of facts and details about yourself ("Hi everyone! I'm... and I'm from... ! I'm addicted to Netflix and Starbucks and I definitely want a gym buddy! Can't wait to meet everyone!") We all know how embarrassing these are to look back on once you’re a senior.
Anyhow, after posting my cheesy, basic, cookie cutter 10 facts about myself, I began accepting (and sending) friend requests to literally everyone in the Class of 2017 Facebook group. I was nervous, and I wanted to make sure I had friends before even arriving to college in the fall. To me, more Facebook friends meant more connections, and more familiarity in a new place.
Entering my senior year, I have not seen, spoken to, or interacted with most of these people I was certain would become my best friends. Of course, I have gotten to know many of the people whom I have friended on Facebook. Many of them have become my friends, and I truly enjoy being able to see where their lives are taking them. However, I think that Facebook has done a disservice by using the term “friends.”
Friends are people you truly care about; people you know, interact with, and converse with on a regular basis. Friends are not people you have never spoken to, or maybe never seen, in real life before. It’s time to stop sending out and accepting friend requests from people we do not even know. Just because you go to the same school as or have mutual friends with someone does not mean you have to be Facebook friends.
What many people fail to realize is how personal a Facebook page really is. When you accept a friend request, you’re allowing that person to look into your life whenever he or she chooses. You’re inviting them to see a glimpse of who you are as a person; what you’re passionate about; who you love; what you enjoy doing. Do you really want to grant this privilege to someone you don’t even know? I know that I don’t.
After stumbling upon this realization, I went through my “friend” list and deleted hundreds of people. Most of them were people from high school who I never see anymore and people from college who I’ve never met. I encourage everyone to do the same. It’s surprisingly refreshing, and makes you realize who you truly value in your life. If you’ve never met someone, don’t be their “Facebook friend.” Meet them first; talk to them, introduce yourself, have a face-to-face conversation. Then, send or accept that friend request.
